yer if that happens and u do not necessarily agree, think it is the best thing to do or U JUST DONT WANT TO ...what should u do...eg. dating a guy..that is the closest thing to my situation...
ok let me lay it out the proper way so i can get exact answers...
ok imma not allowed to talk to this guy i like....ALOT...i think that if i talk to him...IT WILL NOT BE GOOD FOR ME...but it wont harm me...ABOUNA SAID NO...n my parents SAID NO...BUT I RRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLYYYYYY want to .....oh n ipromised God i wouldnt...BUT I REALLY WANT TO...what should i do...
It could be the devil tempting u. If u feel that talking to this guy could really ruin many things in your life right now, and affect ur relationship with ur family, the church and God, then don't do it. But if you feel that you can look at him as just a regular friend then u will be able to talk to him fine
Listen to your Father of Confession and your parents. They know ALOT more than you. They are only doing what is best for you. I know that in your youth it may seem ok, but it may leed to many grave and deadly sins (by the way, didn't you promise God?)
[quote author=Godhelpme3691 link=board=13;threadid=3497;start=0#msg50858 date=1143155791] Listen to your Father of Confession and your parents. They know ALOT more than you. They are only doing what is best for you. I know that in your youth it may seem ok, but it may leed to many grave and deadly sins (by the way, didn't you promise God?)
Please forgive me and pray for me,
Godhelpme3691
That was very well put Godhelpme3691, I agree, didn't you promise God, and as we all know we can't break a promise, you need to listen to your FOC and your parents they know what's best for you, and they know a lot more than you do, because they lived in harder times, now things are much easier and such, so you don't want to break a promise, and is it a long distance relationship, those don't work out to well, neither do the ones about online relationships, are you ready for that type of commitment, do you think you know what you need to know about this guy, do you really think that you can benefit from this relationship, because what I think, is that when your in a relationship, you need to benefit from it somehow, and sorry if I get too personal, but do you think you actually know him, is he a coptic orthodox, do your parents know him, have they met him yet, maybe that is the problem, you have to resolve as in you can actually talk to God, you promised him you wouldn't date though, so your going to break your promise over this person, God is more important, and if you are at the right age, you need to finish school work before you actually think about dating or commitment!
The heart is a liar by itself and the brain is deceitful by itself. The heart and mind must both work together when making a rational choice or else your result will be flawed. If your abouna and parents both say “no” to this certain individual that you are interested in then they must have a valid reason for expressing their feelings towards him so negatively.
Try to understand where they are both coming from and if you don’t agree with their reasoning then talk to them about it and try to get them to see your point of view. Of course you must be obedient but not submissive and don’t give up what you want so easily if you truly love this individual and see a future with him.
Pray about the whole situation, fast, and read from the bible, and also try to get another priest involved or maybe a bishop. Also have this individual talk to the priest and your parents; if he is truly serious about you then he would want to clear up any misunderstandings. Because if he loved you he would not want you to disobey your parents and priest in the first place. Love is sacrificing your wants and needs for the other person, just like our Savior sacrificed His body and blood for our sake.
if u speak arabic or maybe some one can translate? The heart usually is the el zaat. It's what works against ur holy spirit. i am not that good at engilsh ;D
"The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can understand it?" -Jeremiah 17:9
It also tells us not to trust in ourselves, but in God and His word:
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths." - Proverbs 3:5-6
Besides the Bible, how does God speak to us? Through sermons, priests, sunday school servants, parents, etc.... Those people are God's mediators of His message to us. If one (or more) tells you something, or if several have a common thought on somthing, you can almost be assured its from God....
Through your parents and abouna, He's told you what He wants.... now, its your turn to decide who to listen to: the heart which is never sure, or the words of God which are full of wisdom and truth?
Pray about this, He'll make His voice much clearer to get His point across if He has to... because He's just that great :D
Do you think Pride is involved in..Going against your parents and your F.O.C ?
But maybe it is a good idea to ask another priest or bishop.. or maybe not.. I dont know.. would your priest agree to this idea? If not should that stop you from asking another priest or asking a bishop even if he gets upset from you? Maybe someone else on this forum can answer that..
[quote author=mikeforjesus link=board=13;threadid=3497;start=0#msg51008 date=1143272158] But maybe it is a good idea to ask another priest or bishop.. or maybe not.. I dont know.. would your priest agree to this idea? If not should that stop you from asking another priest or asking a bishop even if he gets upset from you? Maybe someone else on this forum can answer that..
if you going to ask another priest or bishop for advice you have to keep few things in mind: 1) how much does this another priest/bishop knows about me? because a no to you can be a yes to me depending on my spiritual history and what i have gone through in life and how much experience i have 2) would your FOC get upset if he knows you talked to another priest about it? (your FOC might not show that he upset about it and i am not saying he is going to treat you different but when you go to somebody for advice then he knows you went to somebody else after it means you dont trust him enough and didnt like what he said) thats my view on asking another priest or bishop now like many others said before sit with your parents and priest and ASK them why are you forbbidien from talking to this guy? i personally don't give up or agree till you give me a good conviencing argument and show me your point of view. Grill and drill your parents/and priest with questions about where they formed their point of view from (i dont know if grill and drill the right words to use but that what came to mind) finally its Great Lent and as the Fraction says by fasting and prayer so and so happened so by fasting and prayer ask for guidance and help (and you know sometimes how you ask God please if this happens than you want me to do so and so) try that ask God for something that is out of your control (that is a key thing ask something that ONLY God can have control over) and say if so and so happens than you want me to talk to this guy if not that you dont want me to talk to this guy Also if you promised God you won't talk to this guy than at some point of time you have agreed with your parents and priest so try to go back to that point of time and see what is different from right now sorry i talked for so long and misspelled a lot of words but i hope that helps
I have to agree with joyisgod; although the heart cannot exclusively be appealed to i.e. to the exclusion of Biblical principles, advice given by one's spiritual adviser etc. it is nonetheless relevant in determining God's will. When the Bible condemns those who place trust in their heart, the context usually implies that those being addressed are in fact those who rely on their heart in opposition to God's will as evidently manifest through other instruments.
On the other hand, the Bible consistently points to the fact that it is within the heart that spiritual cognizance resides (see Rom. 2:15; John 12:40; Luke 8:12, 12:34, 9:47; Matt. 5:8, Ezek. 11:19). Another interesting verse to contemplate upon is Luke 24:32:
"And they said one to another, Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us by the way, and while he opened to us the scriptures?"
I think we need to be cautious, and weigh all our sources for the discernment of the truth (i.e. the heart, the mind, the Bible, the Fathers, advice of our elders, advice of our clergy etc.), in a balanced manner.
[quote author=Coptic Servent link=board=13;threadid=3497;start=0#msg50860 date=1143156761] I have this story my mom told me, and it's true, this egyptian guy, came to america, for like I think it was a visit or something, and than got his visa, so he worked at mcdonald's and he was trying to flirt with an american girl, 15 years of age, so she called her dad, and told him to come quick, than he took that guy to court, and the egyptian guy had to pay a fine of $5,000 and he had a choice after he paid that fine either to leave america and go to Egypt, or stay in prison for 8 years, so I just want you to think about that (I mean everyone), he left to Egypt though!
Forever, Coptic Servent
lol..i dont get ur story..i think u miised a part maybe...
thankyou iqbal..wasim...mike for jesus ...crazy copt...
u guys really helped me..
i must say..there have been time when i have been tempted to the max....(unfortunetly i cannot say i didnt talk to him) but with all my will...i tried obeying abounas words...
and i think it was the best thing to do....
however ..i am still fighting the temptations so i want every1 to pray 4 me...
Rabna m3aaky..God be with you I guess I know how you feel to some extent...It's hard when you want something...and the whole world is against it. I personally if I was in your place (and I have), I would follow my heart...and it works for a while but then by experience you will know that Abouna/parents were right all along. Just take it step by step...and see what's gonna happen...God will show you the right way one day or another...and good luck in everything :)
[quote author=why link=board=13;threadid=3497;start=0#msg51102 date=1143362276] [quote author=Coptic Servent link=board=13;threadid=3497;start=0#msg50860 date=1143156761] I have this story my mom told me, and it's true, this egyptian guy, came to america, for like I think it was a visit or something, and than got his visa, so he worked at mcdonald's and he was trying to flirt with an american girl, 15 years of age, so she called her dad, and told him to come quick, than he took that guy to court, and the egyptian guy had to pay a fine of $5,000 and he had a choice after he paid that fine either to leave america and go to Egypt, or stay in prison for 8 years, so I just want you to think about that (I mean everyone), he left to Egypt though!
Forever, Coptic Servent
lol..i dont get ur story..i think u miised a part maybe...
No, I think you misunderstood me, I just mean to tell you that you have to be careful, because these things may happen, I just wanted to share this, to let you all know, that if you think the world is perfect, it's not, UNFORTNATELY!
Comments
ok imma not allowed to talk to this guy i like....ALOT...i think that if i talk to him...IT WILL NOT BE GOOD FOR ME...but it wont harm me...ABOUNA SAID NO...n my parents SAID NO...BUT I RRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLYYYYYY want to .....oh n ipromised God i wouldnt...BUT I REALLY WANT TO...what should i do...
Please forgive me and pray for me,
Godhelpme3691
Listen to your Father of Confession and your parents. They know ALOT more than you. They are only doing what is best for you. I know that in your youth it may seem ok, but it may leed to many grave and deadly sins (by the way, didn't you promise God?)
Please forgive me and pray for me,
Godhelpme3691
That was very well put Godhelpme3691, I agree, didn't you promise God, and as we all know we can't break a promise, you need to listen to your FOC and your parents they know what's best for you, and they know a lot more than you do, because they lived in harder times, now things are much easier and such, so you don't want to break a promise, and is it a long distance relationship, those don't work out to well, neither do the ones about online relationships, are you ready for that type of commitment, do you think you know what you need to know about this guy, do you really think that you can benefit from this relationship, because what I think, is that when your in a relationship, you need to benefit from it somehow, and sorry if I get too personal, but do you think you actually know him, is he a coptic orthodox, do your parents know him, have they met him yet, maybe that is the problem, you have to resolve as in you can actually talk to God, you promised him you wouldn't date though, so your going to break your promise over this person, God is more important, and if you are at the right age, you need to finish school work before you actually think about dating or commitment!
Forever,
Coptic Servent
The heart is a liar by itself and the brain is deceitful by itself. The heart and mind must both work together when making a rational choice or else your result will be flawed. If your abouna and parents both say “no” to this certain individual that you are interested in then they must have a valid reason for expressing their feelings towards him so negatively.
Try to understand where they are both coming from and if you don’t agree with their reasoning then talk to them about it and try to get them to see your point of view. Of course you must be obedient but not submissive and don’t give up what you want so easily if you truly love this individual and see a future with him.
Pray about the whole situation, fast, and read from the bible, and also try to get another priest involved or maybe a bishop. Also have this individual talk to the priest and your parents; if he is truly serious about you then he would want to clear up any misunderstandings. Because if he loved you he would not want you to disobey your parents and priest in the first place. Love is sacrificing your wants and needs for the other person, just like our Savior sacrificed His body and blood for our sake.
In His Name
i am not that good at engilsh ;D
The Bible tells us:
"The heart is deceitful above all things, And desperately wicked; Who can understand it?" -Jeremiah 17:9
It also tells us not to trust in ourselves, but in God and His word:
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths." - Proverbs 3:5-6
Besides the Bible, how does God speak to us? Through sermons, priests, sunday school servants, parents, etc....
Those people are God's mediators of His message to us. If one (or more) tells you something, or if several have a common thought on somthing, you can almost be assured its from God....
Through your parents and abouna, He's told you what He wants.... now, its your turn to decide who to listen to: the heart which is never sure, or the words of God which are full of wisdom and truth?
Pray about this, He'll make His voice much clearer to get His point across if He has to... because He's just that great :D
Hope all works out for you;
Take care and God bless
Proverbs 16:18 (King James Version)
18Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=proverbs 16:18;&version=9;
Do you think Pride is involved in..Going against your parents and your F.O.C ?
But maybe it is a good idea to ask another priest or bishop.. or maybe not.. I dont know.. would your priest agree to this idea? If not should that stop you from asking another priest or asking a bishop even if he gets upset from you?
Maybe someone else on this forum can answer that..
But maybe it is a good idea to ask another priest or bishop.. or maybe not.. I dont know.. would your priest agree to this idea? If not should that stop you from asking another priest or asking a bishop even if he gets upset from you?
Maybe someone else on this forum can answer that..
if you going to ask another priest or bishop for advice you have to keep few things in mind:
1) how much does this another priest/bishop knows about me? because a no to you can be a yes to me depending on my spiritual history and what i have gone through in life and how much experience i have
2) would your FOC get upset if he knows you talked to another priest about it? (your FOC might not show that he upset about it and i am not saying he is going to treat you different but when you go to somebody for advice then he knows you went to somebody else after it means you dont trust him enough and didnt like what he said)
thats my view on asking another priest or bishop
now like many others said before sit with your parents and priest and ASK them why are you forbbidien from talking to this guy? i personally don't give up or agree till you give me a good conviencing argument and show me your point of view. Grill and drill your parents/and priest with questions about where they formed their point of view from (i dont know if grill and drill the right words to use but that what came to mind)
finally its Great Lent and as the Fraction says by fasting and prayer so and so happened so by fasting and prayer ask for guidance and help (and you know sometimes how you ask God please if this happens than you want me to do so and so) try that ask God for something that is out of your control (that is a key thing ask something that ONLY God can have control over) and say if so and so happens than you want me to talk to this guy if not that you dont want me to talk to this guy
Also if you promised God you won't talk to this guy than at some point of time you have agreed with your parents and priest so try to go back to that point of time and see what is different from right now
sorry i talked for so long and misspelled a lot of words but i hope that helps
On the other hand, the Bible consistently points to the fact that it is within the heart that spiritual cognizance resides (see Rom. 2:15; John 12:40; Luke 8:12, 12:34, 9:47; Matt. 5:8, Ezek. 11:19). Another interesting verse to contemplate upon is Luke 24:32:
"And they said one to another, Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us by the way, and while he opened to us the scriptures?"
I think we need to be cautious, and weigh all our sources for the discernment of the truth (i.e. the heart, the mind, the Bible, the Fathers, advice of our elders, advice of our clergy etc.), in a balanced manner.
I have this story my mom told me, and it's true, this egyptian guy, came to america, for like I think it was a visit or something, and than got his visa, so he worked at mcdonald's and he was trying to flirt with an american girl, 15 years of age, so she called her dad, and told him to come quick, than he took that guy to court, and the egyptian guy had to pay a fine of $5,000 and he had a choice after he paid that fine either to leave america and go to Egypt, or stay in prison for 8 years, so I just want you to think about that (I mean everyone), he left to Egypt though!
Forever,
Coptic Servent
lol..i dont get ur story..i think u miised a part maybe...
u guys really helped me..
i must say..there have been time when i have been tempted to the max....(unfortunetly i cannot say i didnt talk to him) but with all my will...i tried obeying abounas words...
and i think it was the best thing to do....
however ..i am still fighting the temptations so i want every1 to pray 4 me...
I guess I know how you feel to some extent...It's hard when you want something...and the whole world is against it. I personally if I was in your place (and I have), I would follow my heart...and it works for a while but then by experience you will know that Abouna/parents were right all along. Just take it step by step...and see what's gonna happen...God will show you the right way one day or another...and good luck in everything :)
[quote author=Coptic Servent link=board=13;threadid=3497;start=0#msg50860 date=1143156761]
I have this story my mom told me, and it's true, this egyptian guy, came to america, for like I think it was a visit or something, and than got his visa, so he worked at mcdonald's and he was trying to flirt with an american girl, 15 years of age, so she called her dad, and told him to come quick, than he took that guy to court, and the egyptian guy had to pay a fine of $5,000 and he had a choice after he paid that fine either to leave america and go to Egypt, or stay in prison for 8 years, so I just want you to think about that (I mean everyone), he left to Egypt though!
Forever,
Coptic Servent
lol..i dont get ur story..i think u miised a part maybe...
No, I think you misunderstood me, I just mean to tell you that you have to be careful, because these things may happen, I just wanted to share this, to let you all know, that if you think the world is perfect, it's not, UNFORTNATELY!
Forever,
Coptic Servent
im being honest here~ ;)
:D i need more help though...like spriritually...casue IGNORING what ur heart tells u can be sooooooooooooooo difficult...