I was just in this extremely weird place called my head and it was just wondering....what do u guys think of it....i mean i know its bad along with almost everything else, jk, but i wanna know wut u guys think...is all "flattery"bad? Cuz i think of flattery as being too nice to sum1 which ups their pride but what if u "flatter"sum1 just cuz u really mean it...feel free 2 say anything, something, lolx....
GOD BLESS ALL! :-*
Comments
I could have sworn the only "extremely weird place" was my head,oh well...lol
I think that flattery is (depending on how one uses it) a very good thing. Its important to encourage people to do good thing or to show appriciation for the good things that they do because on a personal level it adds value to them in our own eyes. For example if I lust for a women but praise her then she becomes something valuable rather than an instrument for personal pleasure.
Its also a good expression of love.
You are right however, if this is an expression of love then you have to make sure that its something that is going to encourage someone to do more of the same rather than being puffed up. Different people respond to different things differently so there is no real single rule that can be said. I guess you learn by experience and I think that if you do praise someone and they respond in the wrong way, you'll notice very quickly!
I hope that that helps....
God bless,
CS
GOD BLESS ALL! :-*
sleepy
Theres a really nice story, which many of you have probably heard before, about Anba Macarious and one of his disciples that came once and asked the Saint if he could give him a word or two to help him receive salvation. So Anba Macarious told him to go to the monastery's tomb, and insult or mock all the dead monks. Upon doing this, and receiving no replies, the disciple returned to Anba Macarious and told him what happened.
Anba Macarious then told him, go to the tombs again tomorrow, and praise all the dead monks. So the disciple did exactly as he was told, and upon receiving no reply, he returned to Anba Macarious and told him again.
So Anba Macarious explained to him the point of the exercise, telling him, "You know how you insulted them and they did not reply, and how you praised them and they did not speak; so you too, if you wish to be saved, must do the same and become a dead man. Like the dead, take no account of either the scorn of men or their praises, and you can be saved."
(http://www.innerlightproductions.com/thoughts/nov3097.htm)
Even though this story addresses how one should react to praises, I think it makes the point, that if you praise someone too much, they may accept the false glory that comes from the mouths of the people rather than the true glory that comes from God. So, even though I think its really important to praise people and give them kind words to brighten their days, as mentioned earlier, it's also important not to exaggerate or praise someone too much, lest they become proud.
So, one should always keep this in mind, and it never hurts to involve God, when praising someone, saying something like "Thank God, He gave you the ability to this.." or "thank God you reacted this way..." or something along those lines. That way, the person involved can associate what they did well with God's grace. I don't know, this is my opinion on the whole issue. I hope this makes sense...
"He must increase, but I must decrease."
if its between a male n a female then one might get a mixed message or be trying to send a certain message.
however, encouragement, could lift someone out of their bad mood
lostegprincess has a point
in my opinion u cant just say that all of it is wrong. again it depends on how ur meaning it
sleepy
GOD BLESS ALL! :-*
ok first off, one thing to clarify,,
it is of human nature to think that someone is flattering us for somehtign in return.. and this natural idea is always within us..
second of all, flattery is nice when u see someone down, but its wrong when u begin to lie to flatter someone.
thirdly, being straight and honest and deep from your heart is always the best way to communicate with others..
do not flatter someone that you know will fall into sin because of it..
i hope i didnt confuse anyone!!!
unconditional_love
sleepy
GB
sleepy
I get what you're trying to say, thing is, when people see someone treating them nicely, they aren't going to think the way you are right now. They're not going to go see how you treat everyone else, they're going to see you as something else, but yea, I get you. lol
sleepy
No offense or anything, but say you were being nice to sum1 u dont know, they're not going to think of u as a nice person?!?! I dont think thats really true....u dont necessarily have to be nice to sum1 for something in return and i dont think every1 thinx lyk that. It's a matter of manners and respect, people can't be mad at that, and if they mistake it as "bunsiness"flattery, u kno i be nice 2 u, u give me sumthing in xchange, well then they're gonna have a lot of problems in life when ppl r nice to them. JJeeezzz, us humans, we complain when ppl arent nice and now i find out ppl complain when ppl ARE nice....and then we wonder y bad things happen, man ! lolx.. jkjk, i'm not that serious :P
GOD BLESS ALL! :-*
"yea.. take it form some one whgos beent horugh thick n thin with guys...flattery if you dotn realzie the persons feelings can eb EXTREMELY damaging even if you dont mean it to be...before you say something to someone think about who the person is.. what theyre feeligns are-who they haev feeligns for... and if you dotn knwo present feelings tihnk about past feeligns... some things can just re-start feeligns in a person...so in the end it jsut depends...."
i couldnt have said it any other way!! u know, especially with girls (if any of u girls arent like this, please correct me), any one word will cause A MILLION thoughts. sure, the guy could just be trying to be nice, and that is most likely the case 99% of the time, but your brother or sister in Christ may be weaker than you, and though it doesn't affect you, and you're not sinning because you know your intentions, ur brother or sister might fall because they are not so strong as you r.
so u have to be careful, protect ur bro's and sisters, they have enough internal trouble to have to deal with external trouble
(if any of u 4got, i'm slooow) lolx....thanx ;)
GOD BLESS ALL! :-*
I have a question...it really has nothing to do with flattery but i think there's too many new posts for us to handle at a time....but my comment/queston is this: See we are all different people, we're all individuals in our community....but is it possible that each "individual"is more than one person. I mean you're the same person but a bunch of different people at the same time. Like if you're with your parents you act differently than if you were with your friends....i think we're all lyk this, but what i dont understand is, is this wrong and decieving or is it just a part of our daily behavior? Hope u guys get wut i'm saying...if u need me to start a new thread let me know or go ahead and do it...sankis u guys!
GOD BLESS ALL! :-*
Pray for us up there, and intercede on our behalf
sleepy
God bless you Magnoona, although you may not be with us anymore, we wil always remember you, and your good words.
Pray for us up there, and intercede on our behalf
sleepy
I SECOND THAT!!! ALL THA WAY!!!