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How I Dislike Going to Church!
There is this girl in my church who always wants to compete with me in everything that I do. It could be that she is jealous of me because I am more superior, and her parents want glory from the people. I don't care about the glory, I only do anything for a service to God. It is pathetic how I am better in computers than anyone in my church and her parents want to be recognized in something they know nothing in. Also, the person who made the litugy on computer knows nothing about computers. He has to ask my cousin for help all the time. I have a good laugh when I go to church because it is funny how the deacons screw up the responses and the person running the computer is extremely slow. My mom and I enjoy church only for that reason. Please pray for me!
Comments
There is this girl in my church who always wants to compete with me in everything that I do. It could be that she is jealous of me because I am more superior, and her parents want glory from the people. I don't care about the glory, I only do anything for a service to God. It is pathetic how I am better in computers than anyone in my church and her parents want to be recognized in something they know nothing in. Also, the person who made the litugy on computer knows nothing about computers. He has to ask my cousin for help all the time. I have a good laugh when I go to church because it is funny how the deacons screw up the responses and the person running the computer is extremely slow. My mom and I enjoy church only for that reason. Please pray for me!
HAHA! I don't know where to begin!
How old are you?
troll??
I don't know. . .maybe :-\
It was amusing and ironic, that's for sure!
I am 14
Not surprised.
Seek the guidance of your father of confession about your reasons for disliking church.
Show this thread to your father of confession.
Don't post again unless he first sees this entire thread.
Return Orthodoxy
"Remember what man is. He is the image of God, a child of God, a Christian, an inheritor of the Kingdom, a member of Christ. We must therefore esteem every man, although he may bear in his soul the wounds of sins. The wounds -- are wounds; they are made by the Devil and sin, but still the image is the image of God. We must pity him for his wounds, grieve, pray for him as for ourselves; for we are all -- one body. "And hath made of one blood all nations." (1 Cor. 10:17) "We are all partakers of that one bread." (Acts 17:26) Do not pay attention to diabolical disturbances, separations, and animosities. Repeat: everything is -- one. Say: we are -- one.
Count all worldly delights as -- dross and corruption; do not love anything earthly, do not grudge anything earthly to any man, and do not nourish any animosity against him through such things. Love aspires to rejoice the beloved and is sparing of nothing.
Lord, grant that I may see my transgressions, that I may not despise sinners, like unto myself, and may not nourish any ill feeling in my heart against them for their sins, that I may despise myself as I deserve, as the greatest of sinners, and that I may ever feel an implacable hatred of myself -- of mine own carnal man. "If any man . . . . hate not . . . . his own life, he cannot be My disciple" says the Lord (Luke 14:26).
There is no need to ask anyone whether we ought to spread or propagate the Glory of God, either by writing, or by word, or by good works. This we are obliged to do according to our power and possibility. We must make use of our talents. If you think much about such a simple matter, then, perhaps, the Devil may suggest to you such foolishness as that you need only to be inwardly active.
The principal characteristic of this present, temporal life is temptation.
Always remember that your neighbor, whoever he may be, if he is a Christian, is a member of Christ, though he may be a sick one, but then you yourself are also sick, and you must always receive him with respect and love, converse with him heartily, entertain him, and not grudge him anything; neither food, drink, clothes, books, nor money, if he has need of them. The Lord will reward you for him. We are all His children and He is -- everything to us. We are all sinners, and "the wages of sin are" -- misfortunes, troubles, sorrow and sickness, and -- "death". (Rom. 6:23). In order to be saved from sin, we must pray; and in order to pray, faith and hope are most necessary. Prayer out not to cease coming from the mental, and even from the outward lips of a sinner.
During prayer at home and at Church against the craftiness of the Devil, and the distraction of your thoughts, remind yourself of the simplicity of truth, and say to yourself: "simply," I believe in everything that I ask in the simplicity of my heart, and ask for everything simply; whilst all mine enemy's -- craftiness, blasphemies, abomination, and illusions -- I renounce. Let the origin, and the foundation, and the source of all your thoughts, words, and works be humility, the consciousness of your own nothingness, and the fullness of the Godhead Which hath created and filleth everything, and "worketh all in all." (1 Cor. 12:6) He who is infected by pride is inclined to show contempt for everything, even for holy and Divine objects; pride mentally destroys or defiles every good thought, word, act, every creation of God. It is the deadly breathing of Satan."
+ St. John of Krondstadt +
There is no need to ask anyone whether we ought to spread or propagate the Glory of God, either by writing, or by word, or by good works. This we are obliged to do according to our power and possibility. We must make use of our talents. If you think much about such a simple matter, then, perhaps, the Devil may suggest to you such foolishness as that you need only to be inwardly active.
Do you guarantee if we do this in our work place we will not lose our job? you could say only if someone is interested then you may keep your job..what is the statistics of when someone has been interested in our coptic orthodoxy?
I see you've replied to every single thread on this forum since it was created back in 2004, except for my Shoutbox one. I am deeply offended.
I guess I will forgive and forget if you vote "yes".
I am not judging you. I just thought it was a bit related
Christian Girl,
Show this thread to your father of confession.
Don't post again unless he first sees this entire thread.
Return Orthodoxy
Wouldn't matter because I have a course for the next to months, whatever he says won't apply because the course is more important than being put down by ignorant Egyptians!
1) What you say indicates ignorance and despicable sin with your self.
2) You have raised yourself above this other girl and her family, and have judged her and her family.
3) You have raised yourself above your Father of Confession saying that what he says wont apply.
4) The course is more important than ignorant Egyptians, but who says they are ignorant. You are the ignorant one. They may just want their daughter involved in service but you want your own glory (even though you claim you don't).
If you do not fix your problem (and trust me, you have a serious one), then your service is an abomination and unacceptable in the sight of God. You go to church to see the deacons mess up? God will shut out your prayers. Wake up, and if what you are saying is true, arouse your mother to the realization that going to church to judge others is a sin that wont be taken lightly on judgement day.
You are a child. Your Father of confession knows more than you. Be a "christian girl" and seek guidance. You will not find that guidance on this site.
ReturnOrthodoxy
I really hope that this is a joke. If it is not, let me start off by saying what I believe you need to hear.
1) What you say indicates ignorance and despicable sin with your self.
2) You have raised yourself above this other girl and her family, and have judged her and her family.
3) You have raised yourself above your Father of Confession saying that what he says wont apply.
4) The course is more important than ignorant Egyptians, but who says they are ignorant. You are the ignorant one. They may just want their daughter involved in service but you want your own glory (even though you claim you don't).
If you do not fix your problem (and trust me, you have a serious one), then your service is an abomination and unacceptable in the sight of God. You go to church to see the deacons mess up? God will shut out your prayers. Wake up, and if what you are saying is true, arouse your mother to the realization that going to church to judge others is a sin that wont be taken lightly on judgement day.
You are a child. Your Father of confession knows more than you. Be a "christian girl" and seek guidance. You will not find that guidance on this site.
ReturnOrthodoxy
That is as far as you know, everyone in the church said it and my church is only based on who is better than the rest than they treat the rest horribly! If the priest treats me bad, then I see no point to be part of his congregation. She always COMPETES WITH ME regardless of what it is. As if he does, I know a lot of monks and priests who treat me better than my priest
ReturnOrthodoxy
Ignore these thoughts, that will not gain you anything spiritually, financially or academically. You are not going to get a 'trophy' for stressing yourself out and busying your mind with trivial things.
If you find that there is tension between you and the priest in your church, feel free to speak to another priest.
You are quite young and I can understand you may be easily bored/distracted during mass. set an aim: you go to church to pray, listen to the bible readings and have communion. you are not going there on a business trip to assess and criticize the service rituals.
As for this girl you are clashing with, it happens! We will not get along with every single person we meet and specially many teenage girls can have personalities that are not compatible and jealousy is another issue! We just have to 'tolerate' others that we can't bring ourselves to love.
In an ideal world, we would love everyone but we are only human and we are weak.
Tolerance is 'letting other people be'. you are not under any obligation to 'team up' with this girl or become best friends, they will be the occasional 'hi and bye' conversations if you bump into each other...but no need to take this minor issue and blow it completely out of proportion.
It is very easy to fall into the issue of 'families showing off' people boasting their intelligence/wealth. going to church isn't a talent show. It won't get you any credit whether people acknowledge your computing skills or not. It isn't a college application. Save that for when you're applying ;)
Hi <+Christiangirl+>,
I think there are lessons all around. The jealousy is bringing the worst out of you. It's making you feel pride. Jealousy is compeditive and it probably is a competition you don't want to be in, especially in church. A bit like Romeo in Romeo and Juliet who didn't want to be in the fighting the families were in and believed in love, but ended up a murderer who killed himself.
Jealousy is also posessive and it seems like you would be fighting for territory in church, which wouldn't seem quite right.
First of all, you are there for God, so focas on him first. The prayers in the liturgy, the icons and abouna. Next, those people who upset you, who if you are better than they are, then you should help them. Tell Abouna that you would like to help because of the improvements you see that are required.
I think when people share their weaknesses they can bring out our own, so deal with yours first. Pray to God for thr remission of your pride. Then God will help you not to have your reaction to jealousy. Then see Abouna about how to fix the relationship problem in your church.
You've got to be kidding!
lol no kidding!
Welcome to the forums Melissa. Hopefully as you spend more time here you will be able to learn a lot from the other people (as I surely have) about following God and can come back in a year or so and be able to comment on everything you just said.
I pray all will be healed through our lord Jesus Christ. I also pray for you.
Andrew/ReturnOrthodoxy - maybe you should be the ones to show this thread to your confession father?
When Christ met people he took the time to understand them so that he could help them in a real and pragmatic way. Like the samaritan woman, he could have began the discussion with a rebuke for having 5 husbands, and while mentioning never criticised her because He knew what SHE could bear when being correct and what SHE couldn't and because he spoke to her in a loving gentle and merciful way, she was saved. People need love to be saved not reminded of their sins.
We must start by remembering that each and everyone one of us lives in disobedience because the devil beguiles us to see division where it doesn't exist and lovingly encourage her to see she might be misinterpreting the situation. Its not enough to use your own experience and to assume what would work for you will work with her.
If she is saying these things it is no good to say - go to your confession father. How on earth is she supposed to take that advice? You could start by saying something like - are you sure Abouna is like that? Maybe you've got the wrong idea? Why don't you give him a second chance? Maybe you're a bit upset and have the wrong idea? We must encourage one another and help people who are lost to see that the devil loves to keep us from repentance by saying things like Abouna is jealous or angry.
And for yourselves, when you do post in a forum, don't we also have the devil on our shoulder saying to us things which can make a problem permanent? Saying the right thing in the wrong way is another way the devil can use us to keep people from Christ. We need to listen and be prudent so we know if a harsh word or a soft word is required, in this case I believe what you've said is not a measured response to this situation.
Please pray for me,
LiD
What more is there to understand. She is a 14 ear old girl, who claims that she is above all else, claims that her mother is also in this judgment game with her, claims her father of confession is inactive, and wont have anything of the truth. Someone in this position, if given some ind of encouragement, will twist that encouragement, and make it into an excuse for her actions.
You mentioned Jesus with the Samaritan Woman. Jesus took the time to get to know her? He asked her for a drink, told her he had living water, and then exposed her sin. In fact, the way I see it, Jesus didn't waste any time making the woman more comfortable. Also, the Samaritan woman came to Jesus broken hearted. Living in sin was her way, but she had been broken down by people that if given a way out of her sin she would take it. The Samaritan woman was conscious of her sin. <+ChristianGirl+> was not confident of her sin, but rather, of everybody else's sin in her church. What you mean to tell me is that the way to help the all people is the way that Jesus dealt with the Samaritan woman, but never like the pharisees which he often exposed and rebuked harshly.
Before you mention that I need to be conscious of my sin, I promise you that I see my sins everywhere I go. I would rebuke myself, but the reality is, <+ChristianGirl+> started this thread in search for an answer, not my answer.
How is it no good to say "go to your father in confession?" Do you want us to tell this girl over a forum? Shouldn't her priest deal with this problem, her having exposed the problem to him? Or should we make ourselves out to be clergy with the greatest directions. LID, we cant even get through a forum without an argument, are we really going to direct an impressionable 14 year old?
You mentioned that we need to be prudent to know if a harsh word or a soft word is required. Well, Personally, I felt that a harsh word would break her down to a level where she will listen to other people, and be so broken down that she will go to he FOC.
I do not what-so-ever regret what I said. I know the effect I had, and I stand by it, not out of pride, but out of faith in what St. Jude says, "some save by fire." (Jude 1:23) Only tose wo acknowledge their sin can be saved by only love, others who see themselves as perfect when all around them are sinners, and they scoff at their sin, they must be saved by fire as the Lord tried to do with the pharisees.
And the way that <+ChristianGirl+> responded to the nice words of Joshuaa, and seemed to take comfort in them only makes me more worried. <+ChristianGirl+>, I hope that you know that what you are doing is wrong no matter how it is being said. Don't take comfort in the nice tone of someone, and completely forget the lesson in it which is, repent. If you don't like the way I said it and prefer Joshuaa's method, that is fine, but i believe our message is one and the same, being, repent of your sin, and open your eyes.
ReturnOrthodoxy
<+Christiangirl+> come here with a problem with her church and was told she should repent. She is the one being scared off.