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Relationships

stmaryofegyptstmaryofegypt
edited May 2014 in General Announcements
hi all, new to the site. this is gonna sound stupid but its makin me really sad. i cant find a guy interested in me. all the bad and party girls are married in my church and i have problems talkin to guys, im mid 20s. all friends are getting married or in serious relationship. i keep meeting 2 kinds of guys...really great ones who want angels and perfect girls and party ones. im average, i go to church whenever i can and i love the church but i also have lots of flaws so cant get attention of the good guys and dont party or not bad enough to get attention of party guys. i feel really lonely and sad bc im workin really hard on my flaws nd ive changed a lot and i still cant get interest of a guy. i dont know what im doin wrong or wht 2 do. just really upset...please pray :'(

Comments

  • St. PachomSt. Pachom
    I'm 16. I have no other advice than talk to your father of confession, pray, ask God for his will to be shone to you. I will pray for you as well. Pray for my weakness.
    Don't stress! Christ is Risen!
  • antonypaul
    +Christ is risen!

    Dear stmaryofegypt,

    May God grant you the grace you need, and the guidance from your counselors and priest in your church. I hope that you hold fast to your convictions, however, and never do what is wrong for the sake of getting anyone's attention. Fix what is wrong, but don't conform to what is not right. May He grant you the confidence in His perfect will, and the sight to see that He cares for you and knows your needs.

    pray for me,
    ap
  • ZoxsasiZoxsasi
    Beautiful comments there by AntonyPaul!!
     
    I agree - hold hard to your convictions, and always go to Church for Christ, not for any social reasons. Don't worry, you'll be blessed with a good spouse that suits you.
     
     





  • mnc_hnnmnc_hnn
    Nobody can help with this type of issue. I know how you feel! But to be frank, I think you wish someone would tell you "go ahead, be like the rest". But no, no one is going to say that. And moreover, you can't be like them even if you try. It's just not your style, you'll feel that you're acting and won't be happy.

    I have to say that I myself have two semi phobias:
    1. That I'll end up alone
    2. That I'll end up with a horrible relationship

    Both are just as bad, it puts me off relationships a little, but we can't go it alone.

    You know how you said you've changed so much? Isn't it like your perspective has changed and you can think outside the box more? I would feel sorry for the girls who get married so young..many of them really don't know what they are getting themselves into!

    If you are looking to improve yourself more, think of your prospective guy's opinion: "if I were a mature and caring young man who puts god first in his life, would I want to share my life with you?"

    I used to think that I am a "good" "sensible" person, but you know what (and this may be TMI) I realised that I am quite depressed in nature and very pessimistic. What does that offer? That is not a good Christian.
    Conclusion: they are not bad party girls and we are not perfect introverted girls. For all you know, they could be courageous, brave and open to life and we are fixated on wanting something in particular that we don't notice all the opportunities that come our way.

    You need to love you, if you expect someone else to do too. (And that is not saying to be selfish)
  • stmaryofegyptstmaryofegypt
    St. Pachom,

    thanks for the advice ive been prayin about this lots and my confession father says ill be okay just feelin lonely and dont really believe him...thanks please pray for me.


    father antonypaul,

    forgive me father if i was confusing in what i said. i did not mean that i am trying to do bad to get attention of party guys, what i mean is im average person not good enough for good guys not bad enough for party guys but im not trying to do bad im trying to change for better. thank you father for the advice and please keep me in your prayer.

    mnc_hnn,

    thanks for the reply. forgive me i confused you. i do not wish for you to say that...im just upset that im tryin all that i can and still same result...nothing. i dont wish to be like party ppl just makin a comment about me not being enough of that type of girl for party guys to like me. i understand what you say but im not young...im mid20s. forgive me i dont want to make you think im judging these girls, im not...they just have bad reputation in church and post pics of themselves doing things like this, i say this bc ppl in our culture, reputation is evrything to them so if ppl with bad reputation get married, why i cant find a guy?. im not perfect at all i say before i have many flaws that i always trying to fix. i accept that i will have flaws thru out my life and i dont hate myself, im just lookin for average guy like me thats all but everyone thinks im too flawed.
  • [Deleted User]
    edited May 2014
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • [Deleted User]
    edited May 2014
    You're acting as if your the "humility police" or something.
    Like you have a say on whats considered humble and what's not.

    More spammers.

  • stmaryofegyptstmaryofegypt
    Supreme_Orthodoxy,

    if i dont have humility, spirituality, and faith, how can i become nun?

    pray for me please.
  • [Deleted User]
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • mnc_hnnmnc_hnn
    Who's becoming a nun?
  • [Deleted User]
    edited May 2014
    Lol

    Supreme_Orthodoxy (who is now a deleted user) suggested that stmaryofegypt stop thinking about marriage and just go become a nun. Then ridiculing her saying she needs to learn to be humble like him. 

     
  • minatasgeelminatasgeel
    Please ignore anything that Supreme_Orthodoxy said. He's gone now. 
  • [Deleted User]
    Sorry Mina
  • lfahmylfahmy
    Wait. Is he.... dead?
  • [Deleted User]
    Haha :)
  • antonypaul
    +

    In all fairness --- he obviously had remorse for the messages because before he was deleted he went and changed all the posts to "pray for me".

    He might have been a little bit facetious, but I still think he had a point. He was trying to say that we should focus more on the goal - Christ - more than just petty things. I think he's right, sometimes we act all sophisticated and forget how simple Christ really is.

    Pray for me,
    ap
  • Chantelle
    Hi StMary of Egypt I find your discussion so far as very interesting. I would like to also let you know that I'm sure you are a beautiful girl both inside and out ! Don't worry that you have not found the right one yet. He will come believe me don't ever underestimate yourself ok.. If you pray to God with all of your heart and just simply ask him to send you a person it will happen!! It happened to me . I got married at 33 so don't worry ...
  • Chantelle
    StMaryof Egypt do you live in Egypt?
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