if dating is wrong then why does it seem so normal expecially in the US. for example school teachers don't think its wrong the majority of the school think its actually normal. even in television it seems normal then wuts o wrong about it when everybody thinks its right?
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logic if u ask me, i mean, do these people go to church every sunday like we do?? Do they read the bible?? Do they have an abouna to tell them it's not ok...
for them there's no reason for it being wrong, because they don't know any better, they have an excuse for not knowing it...
they think dating is fine, they think pre-marital sex is fine, and look how 2/3 of all marriages end up in divorces :(
we should consider ourselves lucky that we know better than that
as for it being wrong, i suggest u take a look at these threads:
http://tasbeha.org/content/community/index.php?board=1;action=display;threadid=22
http://tasbeha.org/content/community/index.php?board=1;action=display;threadid=919
http://tasbeha.org/content/community/index.php?board=1;action=display;threadid=1033
http://tasbeha.org/content/community/index.php?board=1;action=display;threadid=737;start=15
For example, God forbid, the gay marrige law gets passed, 40 years from now, Gay marriage wouldn't be a topic for discussion, its the "Natural" thing to do.
Besides, its a culteral thing. Not everything that is adopted in a culture is right. For example, it was a culteral practice in Egypt that it is a shame to have a baby girl. They would kill her (Major issue a while back). It is not right, but people used to do it and adovacte it too.
Also, When a guy talk to a girl is not wrong, but the intentions behind it is. The next step. You are providing a venue for the devil to work. Why can't you hang out in groups of 5 or 6 VS. couples?
Dating leades to other sins that we are better off without, so don't put yourself in that situation.
Yeah the society makes everything look ok, and i guess that's why we fall for it from the first place. I am not only talking about the American society, but some egyptians who immigrated to other countries...they got use to the societies and now they are doing what they think is supposedly right when it isn't. I am not trying to judge wut other societies think...because I fall in tht a lot myself...sometimes i think tht the society is right and tht it's normal to do it, but believe me if u experience something u will understand why the church doesn't like dating at a young age when people aren't commited for marriage and serious relationships. I personally can't think of any one i know tht dated at a younger age and it succedded....especially when the two couples are young. Both people will just get hurt and confuse themselves more in life if they went through something tht won't succed. Better leave ur life as it is...then hurting urself and someone else with u. My FOC always tells me that there is a time for everything under heaven (leh kol shaiia taht el samaa wakt)...time will come when u will find a person tht will truly care for u and loves u and be commited to u for the rest of their life. It would be better knowing that u went through with it and got something in return which is marriage...and love u can share between both of u....then going through something at a young age where u wouldn't knw what it's gonna lead to and might cause u more harm than good.
I guess what I am saying is...understand urself understand ur piroties and wut ur life means right now...for most of us it's probably school and getting through it...these things will come later and it would be a whole lot better later then now. Don't look at what society think what's right and what's wrong....look at what ur church and wut it says is right or wrong...be wut u really are...not wut the society tells u to be. I hope I made sense a bit
God BLess,
Marianne
and since i know nobody will read the older threads lol, i'll re-post a part that i found very usefull when i heard it the first time:
a) wastes time
b) exposes you to temptation
c) takes away your energy and concentration from things that edify n build and are more guaranteed then a relationship
d) if your young...it goes against you waiting for God's plan in your life as ur rushin n putting things in ur own hands
e) can often entail thoughts
....there are prolly more reasons...feel free to add on people... (p.s. so far the things i stated assume a fairly clean relationship....if its dating like the rest of the world n most ppl do it...then there are plenty things that make it wrong m not even gonna mention...in hope that we're better than that)
but yea if youre gonna go by society then hekkk its all goood.... do they even still believe in "sin"...this is a society that barely recognizes God so m sure theyre not tooo concerned with actions that offend Him.
Oh my God...this is quote is so good and so TRUE...Another reason why most of the so called socities "marriage" fail...there is no love between them...they just met a lot of people before that they can't be commited to tht one person...because they only give them a part of their love...if there was even love in the first place.
But to play the devil's advocate, what if a person was born in the states, who happens to be a second maybe third generation, who goes to church, from Egyptian roots, but has been going to school, watching TV and all he hears is dating is totally fine, he goes to church, and sees all these beautiful Coptic girls ;) ;) and just goes ahead and dates one of them.... is that okay.... well I know it isn’t okay for us because we come from a culture that is anti dating, but he was raised in a society that favors dating…
so what then?
God Bless,
Marianne
Yeah I agree...then I guess it depends on the person...abt wut he believes he will follow...the society( yeah which would make a lot of people accept him...for A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME)...or the church (which would make God accept him...FOREVER)
posts about this cmon guys fynd some thing new to talk about
aghape chris
But to play the devil's advocate, what if a person was born in the states, who happens to be a second maybe third generation, who goes to church, from Egyptian roots, but has been going to school, watching TV and all he hears is dating is totally fine, he goes to church, and sees all these beautiful Coptic girls ;) ;) and just goes ahead and dates one of them.... is that okay.... well I know it isn’t okay for us because we come from a culture that is anti dating, but he was raised in a society that favors dating…
so what then?
i just wanted to say to that comment (not to pick on you or anything bishoy).... that i dont think kids born and raised generations in north america should be 'treated' any differently than those who are more 'egyptainized'.... it doest make them any different. perhaps they'll struggle more because they've been exposed to it extensively for a longer time, but they should be taught as we are taught: dating is wrong, save it for much later when they're ready to marry. its not ok for them to do it and not others....
they should infact set an example for the newcommers and immagrents on what not to do; namely follow society, because those new to the country will not be as aware and alert to stuff like that as much as those who are more north american....
jus my lil opinion on that
what i meant to say was that there are those who are raised in a more strict way not to date and such, and those are ususally people that arent "generations in north america" .... those that had parents and perhaps grandparents grow up in north america, i think, might be 'more comfrotable' with the idea of going out, because they have been exposed to it for so long, and their parents and grandparents, perhaps, may not stress the 'no going out' as much..... in north america, dating and sleeping with people and is an accpetable and common thing exposed in the media and tv shows and amongs adults and teens.... it's basically everywhere. my beleif is that, although it might happen in egypt and middle eastern countries and such, its not as open and revealed....
that's just my opinion though.... not sure of anything
i hope im communicating my thought properly.......
Just my 2 cents, hope didn't get too many people confused.
We have to educate our children (whether 2nd or 10th generation) that dating is out right WRONG.
well said... i totally agree....
take care and God bless
LOL... ;D ;
lol thats my two cents...(lol ive been sayin "two cents" so much MORE since i discovered tasbeha.org lol...way more than usual) ::)