Most beloved brothers and sisters of Christ our Lord and Our God,
I humbly ask for your most fervent prayers and advice on this matter.
I am plagued by my past incidents so much that I cant have a hold on the present, I am a college student. And I find it very hard to study and socialize sometimes. I suffer from spiritual dryness, I was sort of asking, begging God for something but which didnt happen and now I can't find him, I dont have peace within me, rather constant bitterness, angry, rageful, sorrow....
Please share similar experiences if you had any...
All this creates in me a yearning for a miracles about finding God, hearing God...etc?
How do deal with such desires?
How do you deal with times where you think God doesn't answer, where you think God has bent his arrow right at you ready to attack you... when nothing goes right? When you start to doubt your faith sometimes...?
I also was wondering to visit Egypt particularly St. Anthony's monastery... to a specific anchorite - Fr Lazarus El Anthony.... I really want to see him ... I think he would be a great benefit to me....
Could you guys kinda give me some info about getting to Egypt in a time like this.... with the crisis etc. Should I go or shouldn't I...? How to get there I know it is not in cario and I have to travel by bus or something...?
Thanks an please please (please X 1000) remember me in your prayers and possibly infront of the Holy Altar.
God Bless You.
Comments
if i may offer this: i have indeed felt this way and still do at certain times but i lack to realize that God is indeed working in my life. when i have prayed for close friends, strangers family members etc. i see God's work but when i have prayed for myself i saw that God's hand was lacking and in pondering this i realized that He was not lacking but that i can't pray for myself for i know only what i want but not what i need or what is right for me we must watch for God's will and not entertain our earthly needs or desires. God is not far from you and never is and this is important to remember and it is also important to see the bigger picture though manyy things may be wrong at once look at the few that go right (some may call this count your blessings) and as you keep tab on these small events you will see God's grace and glory, for me anyway this has worked and also as God sees your yearning he will attend and He never delays you must see hope, the light at the end of the tunnel if you will, He is merciful keep your faith, hope and love anything otherwise is a temptation of the devil also your desire for miracles (though if you watch carefully you will see that they happen daily) this is also a way the devil will catch you in his snare so be watchful of this lastly i say all this on account of my experience and journey so i am not as healthy a source as a FOC but you are in my prayers and God be with you and i hope i have helped in some way.