These past few weeks I've been sort of confused, struggling to feel the presence of God in my life. I've been trying to snap myself out of it but my mind just hasn't been in the right place, and I just have so many questions. But now I'm trying to start over. All I'm asking for is just a prayer for Him to reach out His hand and turn me in the right direction again.
Comments
These past few weeks I've been sort of confused, struggling to feel the presence of God in my life. I've been trying to snap myself out of it but my mind just hasn't been in the right place, and I just have so many questions. But now I'm trying to start over. All I'm asking for is just a prayer for Him to reach out His hand and turn me in the right direction again.
I have been struggling with this (and continue to struggle) for the past 5 months or so. It is hard, I know. Often times, I want to give up. It is extremely painful, and it feels like everything that you once held to be true has shrunk away into nothingness. God was a real presence in your life, but now, He seems distant.
With the permission of your FOC, consider doing the following:
-Increase your prayers (whether in quantity of prayers or in time spent contemplating the prayer)
-Increase spiritual readings
-Increase reading of the Bible (its best to work with the new testament)
-Increase your fasting
-Increase your attendance of church services and receiving of communion
Remember that all this needs to be done with the permission of your spiritual father. These may help your soul refocus on God. It may bring your understanding back to the simplicity needed to feel God.
Pray for me that I, as well, may feel God's presence!
ReturnOrthodoxy
Now I have to figure out how to attain faith. Maybe I have it and I just don't know, but to be honest, I believe in God because the evidence infers His existence. That is not real faith, a good start maybe but not real faith.
George, we all go through slumps, converts and cradle alike. It is a tough struggle but we must endure to the end.
I have been struggling with this (and continue to struggle) for the past 5 months or so. It is hard, I know. Often times, I want to give up. It is extremely painful, and it feels like everything that you once held to be true has shrunk away into nothingness. God was a real presence in your life, but now, He seems distant.
With the permission of your FOC, consider doing the following:
-Increase your prayers (whether in quantity of prayers or in time spent contemplating the prayer)
-Increase spiritual readings
-Increase reading of the Bible (its best to work with the new testament)
-Increase your fasting
-Increase your attendance of church services and receiving of communion
Remember that all this needs to be done with the permission of your spiritual father. These may help your soul refocus on God. It may bring your understanding back to the simplicity needed to feel God.
Pray for me that I, as well, may feel God's presence!
ReturnOrthodoxy
You have described exactly what I have been experiencing. And as far as Bible reading goes, I've actually begun reading the entire Old Testament in order, starting with Genesis. I'll definitely talk about it with my FOC before I go on.
[quote author=Ioannes link=topic=13035.msg153156#msg153156 date=1331953117]
George, I think we all go through this. I have recently found that I do not have much faith. It was a very difficult thing to realize and accept, that me, the defender of the Coptic Church has no faith. I am happy that this was revealed to me, I think I fell into this idea of doing things to gain acceptance from Christ. I am reminded of Luther who was renowned by his fellow monks for being able to fast for three days with no food. Sleep outside in the dead of winter with not blankets. That was me. Able to do some pretty fantastic things, but I was lacking completely in faith.
Now I have to figure out how to attain faith. Maybe I have it and I just don't know, but to be honest, I believe in God because the evidence infers His existence. That is not real faith, a good start maybe but not real faith.
George, we all go through slumps, converts and cradle alike. It is a tough struggle but we must endure to the end.
It's kind of funny, you say you believe because evidence infers His existence; I feel like my faith is the opposite. I sometimes feel that evidence points to His non-existence, yet I feel something pushing me to dig deeper, and I've experienced many things in my life to know that this can't be the case.
Thank you all for your responses; you are all certainly in my prayers as well.
In my own life I have had to learn the hard way that it is better to achieve no outward results at all, and appear to be a complete failure, and yet be simply obedient, than to achieve things outside of God's will and his grace. And it is better to trust God for the future and for all service and for the salvation of his own Church, rather than to take this burden upon ourselves.
What is the little thing we see in front of us each day that we should be doing? That is what it seems to me is most important. If we cannot do this little thing then why will we be granted grace for something greater? If we can say truly that God does not need me, he does not need my service, he can use a donkey to do better what I think I can do best, then we are starting to be in the right place.
It is more important that we consider what sort of person we are, than what things we are doing. It is easy to think that really our Lord was wrong, and that Martha, the busy sister, was the one who should be commended for all her activity. But in fact it is better to become a Mary, to sit at Christ's feet, and only from the experience of that contemplation to go and serve.
I am still learning this. And of course this is not an excuse for laziness, or a lack of service. But if we are not the right quality of person, then the quantity of our deeds means little.
The Pharisee was in the Temple precincts every day, but his prayers were not heard.
To desire God above all things, and only for himself, and not for anything he might give, is the heart of the Christian life. If we do not have this desire then we can ask him for it, and he will give it, though the receiving of it may be hard and difficult and require a great change in our character.
If you are interested in reading it let me know, you can purchase a paperback copy or I can send you a .Pdf file.