I have been having this issue for quite some time now. I love the church and my life basically is either school or church. Honestly, the only place that i go other than my house is church. So i think you guys get the idea of how much I try to be involved in church. Now i didn't say this to brag or anything, but i promise it leads into what I am going to say.
Now that I have established that, I feel like, I only like church for church and not God. It's kind of weird I understand but i am going to be honest. I go to church because I think that I like the services and the hymns more than I love God. Let me rephrase that a little. I like to learn so many things to help me praise God, but I can't love Him.
It's like knowing somebody your whole life, and then you realize that you in reality didn't know Him. I don't know how to love God. Yes, He has done so many things for me, and there have been weeks where i felt very close, but I feel like i don't know Him and sometimes I feel like He doesn't love me even though i know it isn't true but i can't convince myself because i don't really know Him.
Any advice or comments and criticisms are greatly wanted and appreciated. Thanks guys.
Comments
Well, for one thing, God has given you this realization. As you progress in your spiritual life, God slowly reveals more and more unseen, hidden errors in your life. God has brought it to light. Every error that He brings to light is so that you can work with Him to correct it. Rejoice in that. That you are simply in a process of change and improvement in your spiritual life. Thank God for His love and compassion despite your many mistakes. Thank God for it is He who will help you overcome this situation and that only good will come out of it. Now God has revealed to you the problem. He also has in His hands the solution, the only solution as well. Pray and ask that God may teach you how to love Him more and more. In the meantime, thank Him for He is the only One that will solve this issue and that despite any errors in the future, His love for you will remain unwavering.
Thank you for reminding me that God is the One who revealed this flaw to me. I will continue to pray for this issue and God willing He will help me as He has never failed before. Thank you drilago99, I feel like there must be some higher authority that sent you here (i wonder who... :) ).
We take things for granted, no different than the love of our parents. It is only when a parent dies that you have that yearning for the love, that you take for granted on a daily basis.
I almost thought Pope Shenouda was going to live forever. It never entered my mind that he would go to his rest. When he was in Cleveland recovering from his fracture, I kept saying that I will head to Cleveland to see him, but I never had the chance.
Geo, you're human.
Continue to care for His Altar. When you enter the altar kiss it as if you are kissing the Face of God, no different than your parent or grandparent. As you do so, pronounce the words: "I love you my God." I do that every day at the altar, no different than when I would leave to go to school and kiss my parents.
The Love of God is such a Precious Thing.
Pronounce the words, and don't just think it, and say: "I love you God."
We take things for granted, no different than the love of our parents. It is only when a parent dies that you have that yearning for the love, that you take for granted on a daily basis.
I almost thought Pope Shenouda was going to live forever. It never entered my mind that he would go to his rest. When he was in Cleveland recovering from his fracture, I kept saying that I will head to Cleveland to see him, but I never had the chance.
Geo, you're human.
Continue to care for His Altar. When you enter the altar kiss it as if you are kissing the Face of God, no different than your parent or grandparent. As you do so, pronounce the words: "I love you my God." I do that every day at the altar, no different than when I would leave to go to school and kiss my parents.
The Love of God is such a Precious Thing.
ilsm, that is beautiful advice. I honestly hope that I can some day soon pronounce the words "I love you God" with the genuine Christian love rather than ritually stating it. I will most definitely make it my goal to keep those words on my mind while at church or before i do anything. Thank you as usual ilsm for another uplifting post.