Howdy, Stranger!
It looks like you're new here. If you want to get involved, click one of these buttons!
Categories
- All Categories 13.8K
- General Category 10.9K
- General Announcements 184
- Faith Issues 3.4K
- Coptic Orthodox Church 2.5K
- Personal Issues 1.4K
- Prayer Requests 423
- Random Issues 1.8K
- Introductions 294
- Non-Orthodox Inquiries 232
- Youth Corner 606
- Hymns 2.5K
- Hymns Discussion 2.5K
- Technicial Difficulties 368
- Technical Topics 368
forgiveness
hi
one of my non-orthodox friends has been having some personal trouble. lately one of her exboyfriends (went out for eight months) has been asking her to get back together w/him, and she was about to. but one night she went to the movies w/her family and saw him w/another girl. kissing. she was really upset. well this isn't the first time he had done this. while they were going out, he cheated on her 3 times if not more. she usually forgives him after a couple of months. anyway... well i told her about the coptic churches view on dating. but i thought if she forgives him, he would never learn and do this to her over and over agian. but recently we had a bible study about forgiveness. so that made me wonder if she should forgive him or just ignore him and put him out of her life. also, when i was say "Our Father who art... " i realized that we say "forgive us our trespasses AS WE FORGIVE OTHERS" so that made me wonder what she should do. what do you think she should do?
God Bless
one of my non-orthodox friends has been having some personal trouble. lately one of her exboyfriends (went out for eight months) has been asking her to get back together w/him, and she was about to. but one night she went to the movies w/her family and saw him w/another girl. kissing. she was really upset. well this isn't the first time he had done this. while they were going out, he cheated on her 3 times if not more. she usually forgives him after a couple of months. anyway... well i told her about the coptic churches view on dating. but i thought if she forgives him, he would never learn and do this to her over and over agian. but recently we had a bible study about forgiveness. so that made me wonder if she should forgive him or just ignore him and put him out of her life. also, when i was say "Our Father who art... " i realized that we say "forgive us our trespasses AS WE FORGIVE OTHERS" so that made me wonder what she should do. what do you think she should do?
God Bless
Comments
so, is it ok if she forgives him but not completely
also is it ok if she feels he isn't worth her time?
she should forgive him, but leave him because obviously he's not doing her any good. saying that he isnt worth her time puts her in a position of much superiourity, and the whole idea of humbling oneself through forgiveness is kinda taken away at that point.
from what i think, she should just forgive him and that's that... no need to put lables on him such as 'not worth her time' or 'player' or whatever- just seperate herself from him.
if she still has feelings for him, she should probably cut off the friendship until she can get over him, so as to avoid making mistakes...
but if she thinks that she's over him and wants to be friends, then she can enjoy his friendship as long as it doesnt spark any other feelings or whatnot, cuz i dont think she wants that
just my 0.5 cents
take care and God bless
pray for me
GB ALL
+FROG+
thats a tuph question but im sure theres a simple answer.
now we do have to forgive everyone all the time as many times as needed. think about all the sins God has to forgive, thats a tough job.
however, one must not be near sighted or naive. be strong and look for the best answer. while forgiving him may make her feel better, think of all the other girls hes hurting. the girls hes cheating on her with probably have no clue and so thats like 10 grls hes hurting. maybe if she broke off all ties then his sin will not double. dating and cheating, thats a bigge.
It's kinda of confusing...but if I was in her place...i would forgive him and if I still love him I would have went back to him...that's wut forgivness is all abt...u forgive a person b/c u love them
God forgives us because He loves us...and he doesn't say oh if i forgive them...they will just keep on doing it....He still forgive us every time we fall knowing that this will just keep happening on and on...but one day we will go back to Him and see His love for us...
That guy might stop doing that and come back to her...b/c he loved her at least once.
Yeah i knw people are gonna argue abt me comparing the stituation to our relationship w/ God...but that's how I personally see it...
I have seen that happen before and surprisngly enough...the girl i knw still went back to that guy...but I knw she does love him thou...
It's kinda of confusing...but if I was in her place...i would forgive him and if I still love him I would have went back to him...that's wut forgivness is all abt...u forgive a person b/c u love them
God forgives us because He loves us...and he doesn't say oh if i forgive them...they will just keep on doing it....He still forgive us every time we fall knowing that this will just keep happening on and on...but one day we will go back to Him and see His love for us...
That guy might stop doing that and come back to her...b/c he loved her at least once.
Yeah i knw people are gonna argue abt me comparing the stituation to our relationship w/ God...but that's how I personally see it...
Your comparison is very understandeable and if this was a marriage, i would be behind you 100%, but its not, they're dating, the whole point of dating is to find someone mature with good values who doesn't hurt you.
- god said 2 forgive so she should try, its hard especially ina situation like this but don let her do anythin shes uncomfortable in doin
god bless
mazza
It is know that such relationships are not exactly perfect (especially at teenage).
It seems that we all agree on the response to such a situation. However we often forget that the problem comes from attatchment. What I mean by the this When ppl say " Oh, I love him so much I'd forgive him anything." "He still loves..." and so on...
This so called is nothen but blibd infatuation. A relationship based on love is a two-way thing. You can't just love the other person if they dont sincerely love you, becauae you will be loving amiss! A true love is one that is as St.Paul said :
Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up;
does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil;
does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth;
bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
1 Corinthians 3:4-7
To be quite frank, boyfriend/girlfriend relationship at general level(i.e. not leading to marrage) doesn't USUALLY, usually involve the Love st.Paul was talknig about in corinthinans.
...But that's just my imression anyway...
Love
GB ALL
+FROG+