After so many years being an independent dreamer, I have finally concluded that it is important to have my own family and that it would be selfish to stay alone if I do not have any kind of monastic vocation, and if I fail to establish a normal relationship with someone else.
About 9 months ago, I started a relationship with someone who asked me to marry her and who thinks that marriage is important. Unfortunately, her family belongs to an Evangelical Protestant congregation founded by a Mexican disciple of Billy Graham (I'm sorry but I can't call such thing a "Church" in any way).
She initially agreed to marry in the Coptic Orthodox Church and I didn't refuse to be blessed by her "pastor" since he is nothing but a layman who will recite a speech and who has no power from God to to anything else but that.
However, her family (her step father grew up in the USA) thinks that we Orthodox Christians are posessive and jelous, and to make it worse I am from the countryside and I returned to the countryside of my country after spending some time in Europe. It is clear that I am not a modern-minded man.
She met Abouna a few days ago and was impressed by his knowledge of the Bible and understands that we are right in what we do. However, she felt troubled by the fact that she has to receive Baptism. This makes no sense to her since she had been baptized by a Catholic priest when she was a baby and then by an Evangelical preacher when she was about 25 years old (they do not believe in infant baptism).
Abouna told her that while both Catholics and Orthodox share the faith of the Apostles and have the priesthood and the sacraments, the Catholics changed the way sacraments are administered and that she should receive Baptism in the Orthodox manner. Most Catholics see no problem in accepting Baptism by a Coptic priest as they know that the Coptic Church does not dispute the validity of the Catholic sacraments. However, Abouna said that while the Coptic Church now receives some Catholics by Chrismation, he cannot approve the marriage unless she accepts Baptism, as she was raised by Evangelicals who do not believe in the sacraments.
She does like the fact that we are serious in what we do. However she also said that our Church is too complicated and that she's afraid of loosing the faith in God completely seeing that there are so many denominations that do not recognize each other as Christian. She dislikes the fact that I spend "too many hours" in "repetitive" liturgies.
And yes, "our Church is too complicated" but at least there is no contradiction between the teachings of the Orthodox Church and what we do or should do in our lives (I am a sinner, and my family and friends know that i am NOT perfect).
However, her mother is not even married to the man who brought her to the Zionist sect. They treat their daughter (in front of other people I suppose) as if she had been an inocent little girl before she met me and this is far from being the truth.
I think that Abouna is right in his kind but strict ways because God is more important than the modern trends of our time. If she refuses Baptism but thinks that what she did before in her life is OK, then this means that God does not want her to be my wife.
All I want from her is to open her heart to the true teachings. On the other side, I am required to pay for a wedding party and all kind of material things.
I no longer feel sad about this situation since there are so many women who understand that a large number of men today are attracted to other men, drink, smoke, do drugs or do not even want to get married.
Comments
I don't see how saying they must is not judging when it comes from some people
But it may not be judging from how it comes from the mindset of people I am guessing but I do not know