hurtful depression moments

hany58

Hey all
I just had a thought about getting help from you guys regarding something that really bother me. Do you guys sometimes get something like very hurtful depression moments, like they happen from any situation, e.g a best friend betrays you, you lose someone that you really love, or you feel that you are ignored by your friends, or you have problems in your house, or being hurt badly by someone.....etc. I get these moments quite a lot now and it does really hurt me and I don't know how to deal with it at all, it keeps on hurting me until i find myself sometimes crying in my room without anyone at all feeling me, and trust me this is the worst feeling in the world, I have tried praying hard and hard, i felt a bit better, but again I just need help in what exactly to do. Do you guys sometimes get these moments of depression as well or is it only me???? please tell me about every single detail of how to help myself and how to deal with something like this.

Guys please allll offff youuuu participate in this discussion, I need every single opinion because really i'm feeling bad and I'm scared that i might get a real depression one day.

thanks

Baladoos

kyrillos02

Yeah I know exactly what you mean, I feel like that alot too, anyone got ideas?

hany58

Lol i really don't know what to say, but really i'm talking about moments that makes you feel that that life is really really really bad, I know that this might sound as a lack of faith, but honestly its going so hard on me and I don't really know what to do at alllllllll, I feel really bad most of the time now, worried, troubled, i cry heaps even though I'm a guy and I have to be strong, but i just can't handle it anymore, suddenly one of my friends in church is getting a bit bad to me and jelous of me, God knows that i haven't done anything bad to me, but he tries his very best to make me look bad in front of my friends, especially girls, I tried talking with him before but he is still the same, he doesn't want to change at all, I'm 22, and he is 21, he tries his very best to make me look bad in front of the girl that I love so that he can grap her attention to him, that kills me and I just ask myself a question: What have i really done to deserve to be treated this way from the people that I really love??????

I hope I can get help from anyone

thanks

Servantofmary

ya u r absolutly right.depression is really bad.

u know wat? wat u freind is doing to u is not right but i tell u sth,be nice to him.even more nicer than u used to be and pray for him.u know why because he will feel guilty.u said that he treis to make u look bad infront of the girl u love.just have faith in God my brother.if this girl is urs no one can change this.

okay let me tell u wat i do when i get depressed.first of all i pray, listen to nice church songs and watch saints movies and if possible go to church or go out for a walk.

If u still don't feel better,try to chat with someone who makes u feel better.for example it could be a freind or someone that u know from church(someone spritually better than u r)

oh i gorgot,i always phone or go to my father of confession and he gives me the best advice.even if he tells me one verse from the bible,it makes me feel better.try to do this as wel.

Most of all try to tell all ur problems to St.Mary.i tell u wat she is the best to turn to.

hope i have said sth.
pls pray for me.

May God help u and the prayer of St.Mary be upon u.Amen

hany58

Thanks very much for that help, I really appreciate that really, please pray for me lol coz it is really bad on me.

kyrillos02

I realize now after girl problems that ALWAYS had me depressed cause it felt like I was missing something in my life, and I thought it was a girl, turns out it was God after all, when I started getting close to God and church again, I don't feel THAT depressed, still depressed sometimes but for the most part I'm fine. Sometimes I feel like God isn't even there and just left me, but then I remember that verse, I don't know it exactly, it's something about the birds and finding food, and God knows the hair on our heads, (btw if someone knows what verse I'm talking about a reference would be nice =] )

Marianne87

"Then Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?" (Luke 12:22-26)

I think that's the verse that you were talking about kyrillos02

Forgiven1

it is totally normal for us to feel "down" with all the hardships that this world can bring. The problem is when we begin to get "depressed". Clinical depression is a horrible thing and we must seek God's help with all of our heart when we feel ourselves getting to this point. God wants us to be joyful on this earth no matter what, because we know that the problem of this earth are fleeting and we look forward to the life of the coming age where there will be no sadness. Go to this link my friend, I hope that it helps u.
http://www.orthodoxsermons.org/index.php?option=com_docman&task=cat_view&gid=59
God Bless u and give u endless Joy in Him

hany58

Thanks heaps, guys what deeply hurts me that most of my friends started changing with me, most of them now think that I'm a closed church boy that is not open enough for them. I feel it when i start talking that all of them start going silent and none of them even reply to my words, I tried giving lots of love them as I normally do, they sort of feel that I'm a good guy but they just think that i'm not their type to be among them anymore, it's a horrible feeling being lonely, my brother that I consider as my best friend left me and went to another countary, now I'm here in my countary alone, and even my friends started changing from my side and none of them even bother to care about me when I'm sick or didn't come to church or when anything happens to me. It is really the first time it happens with me, I really started thinking that the problem is really with me and not with them. I feel lonely, and left, even though i text everyone of them when he/she is sick, but i just don't know why this is happening to me. I prayed alot and alot and alot, but God is really taking long in replying, I know that I must have faith, but sometimes i sit in my room crying for hours when I get extremely hurt and feel lonely. The only decission that i came accross is that i will leave the countary and go to another countary where i can go to a different church and meet some new people that might love me for my own personality. I don't know if what is happening with me is normal or not, does it happen with any of you? Does any of you get that depressed like how i am now?? How can i help myself and get all that pain out of my heart when i don't have a close friend that can listen to me when I say "Ah". I thought about telling my mum, it was a good idea, but after a bit of time I found that there are stuff that I just can't tell my mum about. I do think that this site is my final hope of getting some good help to come over this aweful timing of life. Hope someone can help me with any opinion or any advice on exactly what to do.

God bless you all

Baladoos

kerestina

Throughout the years
I have had many different people as my best friends.
They have all been very different from each other.
Yet somehow they have all been similar.
They had characteristics that blended with mine.
They were kindred spirits with me --
they were truly the soulmates of my life.

Together, these best friends and I
have laughed, cared, talked, listened, and cried.
Together we played, worked, and dreamed.
Such special friends were they, that at times,
we enjoyed doing nothing together.
Years have gone by
and I sometimes wonder
where they have all gone.
Some have moved.
Some developed different interests.
These were friends whom I once thought
I could never live without.
The best friends of my life
have had an integral part
in me becoming who I am today.
They brought out the best and the worst in me.
They loved me enough to confront, to challenge and to console.
They encouraged me in my strengths and
helped me overcome my weaknesses.
Though I know not where they live,
have discovered where they all left something for me.
It is a room -- a delightful room which lies within my heart.
It is one of my most favorite places.
I go there when I am lonely, sad
or when I want to remember... and be with
the treasured golden memories
the best friends of my life left for me.
Forever -- my friends will be a part of me
as I hold onto and cherish them
in that special room in my heart.

i just thought it was a really nice poem to share

kerestina

even my friends started changing from my side and none of them even bother to care about me when I'm sick or didn't come to church or when anything happens to me.
Disagree, just because they don’t enquire about you doesnt mean that don’t care about you nor do they think about you. Each individual is a crucial part of the church and as the church grows so do the people, you become a family.

It is really the first time it happens with me, I really started thinking that the problem is really with me and not with them.
Your a great person, we all have our strengths and weakness but please don’t think that you are the problem.

I feel lonely, and left, even though i text everyone of them when he/she is sick, but i just don't know why this is happening to me. I prayed alot and alot and alot, but God is really taking long in replying, I know that I must have faith, but sometimes i sit in my room crying for hours when I get extremely hurt and feel lonely.

God is definitely listening but its all about time and the Lord knows what’s good for you.

The only decission that i came accross is that i will leave the countary and go to another countary where i can go to a different church and meet some new people that might love me for my own personality.

We are all unique and blessed children of God, unfortunately we don’t get along with all people but don’t question your personality because your God’s creation. Leaving your home is quite a drastic decision, there are other options.

I don't know if what is happening with me is normal or not, does it happen with any of you?

Yes for sure, there are plenty of times when we think that no one cares about us or thinks of us but don’t let these thoughts get the better of you. I cant remember how old I was, but on one of my birthday's my friends forget my birthday, and i remember at the time i was really quite upset and felt quite alone but i realised the most important friend that never leaves me is God and my familly. dont be afraid to lean on pplz shoulder in your time of need

Forgiven1

I do think that this site is my final hope of getting some good help to come over this aweful timing of life. Hope someone can help me with any opinion or any advice on exactly what to do.
My friend, while we are all her because we want to help, u Must understand that this site is neither your first or your last hope, it is not your hope at all...Hope is a very strong word if u think about it, and Jesus Christ the lamb that dies and rose from the dead for our sins is our ONLY hope. This site is a good place to find other Coptic Christians who care and can given u some advice, but that is the extent of it. Turn to Christ for all of your needs friend, His Grace is sufficient for you. Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me. 9 And He said to me, [glow=red,2,300]"My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness."[/glow] Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9

[quote author=baladoos link=board=10;threadid=4655;start=0#msg63552 date=1164017854]
what deeply hurts me that most of my friends started changing with me, most of them now think that I'm a closed church boy that is not open enough for them. I feel it when i start talking that all of them start going silent and none of them even reply to my words, I tried giving lots of love them as I normally do, they sort of feel that I'm a good guy but they just think that i'm not their type to be among them anymore
My Friend! It sounds to me like u have something to rejoice about, rather than be depressed!! As u put it, they now consider u a "closed church boy". This means that u are doing something right. There is always resistance to our change for the better. Perhaps u are growing stronger in your faith and they cannot appreciate that u dont act the way that u used to? If so, then u should rejoice in this persecution, U are persecuted and thought wrongly of or are losing your good friendships for Christ's sake. Please correct me if I misunderstood u, but it sounds as if they dont talk to u the same anymore because u are a "church boy". In this case, U should rejoice and know that God will see all and in His time will richly reward u.... You will have something far better, God will give u the friends that love u and are around u for the right reasons, because they have that mutual Christ -like love that u have. Those are the kind of "true" friends that stick closer than a brother and will never leave your side. Cheer up my friend, and God bless to all........

Mira8388h

[quote author=baladoos link=board=10;threadid=4655;start=0#msg63524 date=1163963993]
Hey all
I just had a thought about getting help from you guys regarding something that really bother me. Do you guys sometimes get something like very hurtful depression moments, like they happen from any situation, e.g a best friend betrays you, you lose someone that you really love, or you feel that you are ignored by your friends, or you have problems in your house, or being hurt badly by someone.....etc. I get these moments quite a lot now and it does really hurt me and I don't know how to deal with it at all, it keeps on hurting me until i find myself sometimes crying in my room without anyone at all feeling me, and trust me this is the worst feeling in the world, I have tried praying hard and hard, i felt a bit better, but again I just need help in what exactly to do. Do you guys sometimes get these moments of depression as well or is it only me???? please tell me about every single detail of how to help myself and how to deal with something like this.



Hey baladoos
I know what you are talking about!
Them moments makes you relive every single bad sec. you lived and passed through!

Unknown

Hany habibi,
Im sad to read this post from you my dear brother.

This is awful news. i don't know what reason exactly u feel depressed for, but i'd like to draw your attention to one small thing:

Hany:Are u sure this isnt a case of sadness or just anger? Either is OK. Depression isnt something i tend to associate with someone Christian.

I mean, do u realise a person can be sad but joyful?
I person can be grieving by still joyful?!
Its strange i guess to hear that, but u should ask your father of confession about this.

Christ said: "To abide in me do one thing: Keep my commandments... then your joy will be complete".

How then can u be depressed? What happened??

Listen, this is a serious issue, and I suggest u discuss this with your Spiritual Father!!

Take Hani,

and I'm not happy. I hope, with all my heart, u are confusing this with just sadness or grief!! Depression is really something awful... im sure u'll realise it when u consistently and systematically and with all your will decide to shut the Holy Spirit from your life by sinning or living in dispair.

hany58

I'm really happy from all of you guys, also i'm very happy that I have people that love me that much without even seeing me or meeting me, I really appreciate that, please pray for me as much as you can, it is just hard whenever i think about it I get very upset and depressed. I will pray and pray and pray and I'm sure God won't leave me alone

thanks

Unknown

Hani,
Unless u suffer from the medical, psychological illness "Depression" or better known as "Manic Depressive" - then u are just sad. Believe me, depression will come when u are far from God because you are in a state of dispair or sinfulness , where u systematically and willingly wish to distance yourself from God.

If u feel that you are depressed, yet are not trying to be far from God, then my suggestion is this: (AND Im VERY VERY SERIOUS!):

Take a 2 week vacation with 1 or 2 good friends somewhere fun.

Just take a break. Perhaps u r suffering a lot hanging around egyptians. I know i did.

Forgiven1

;D Vas u are a funny dude yo. Dont for get one thing though, when u are taking that vacation or break from the world, make sure that is not from the spiritual world as well. STAY strong beside God, like Vas said, if u are truly clinically depressed, then it is probably because u are far from the Lord, so when u go on that vacation, remember to take Him with u. This will make the vacation SOOOOOOOOO much more fulfilling. God Bless

hany58

thanks for your great replies guys, I really appreicate that, well I don't really suffer from clinical depression, but i feel so sad, I pray to God a lot, I try to get closer to him, i try to always participate in my best hobby which is learning hymns, but really becasue I feel so sad it makes me unable to perform or do anything at all or concentrate in anything, i can't work, talk, or learn hymns or do anything, even though i'm a very active person. I know that sometimes life gets a bit hard because this even happened with St Paul, so yea, I'm trying my very best to talk to the lord and ask him for help all the time, but its very hard not to have friends that cares about you, its quite difficult on me and tears me. I hope that God won't make that period of time so long and to comfort me.

Any more help guys, please advice me

Baladoos

Unknown

Forgiven1, u keep on following me from thread to thread, i'll report u for stalking!!!

Hany: Listen: Take a vacation, and OBVIOUSLY take God with u. What that means is, if u are angry or in dispute with God because He has allowed some bad things to happen to u, then, remain in communication with Him, and do not leave Him: I.e. DO NOT SIN AGAINST HIM!!

Man, i was talking about a simple vacation in Sharm Il Sheikh... Forgiven1 is from New York, so, u can imagine the drug crime, killings etc that he's seen. i'm not talking about a vacation in New York! I'm from France, so basically, i'm talking about eating a crepe, listening to some old french music... do u drink wine?? have a nice glass of french wine... relax...

Stay away from Egyptians. No matter how much i try and like them, i find them very strange... especially in the diaspora. Perhaps we have the same problem Hany?? Don't mix so much with Coptic people if u are depressed... they'll make it worse.

hany58

Lol that you are quite right, i need to have a bit of a break of everything and talk to God more, What kills me is that my best friend is the one that deeply wounded me, this person killed me with what she done. I honestly forgive her for everything she done, but really i feel bad that i'm losing her and losing her nice friendship, I tried asking myself i have done anything bad to her or annoyed her with any action or words but honestly i didn't, i have tried asking her before if i have done anythng bad to her or hurt her in anyway and she said "Hany you haven't done anything at all", God knows that I'm not upset from her but I just need her friendship and miss her presence and warm friendship feelings. I don't know, but I'm confused and upset about what is happening. Guys and gals please forgive me if i was a bit depressing or if i upset any of you. please pray for me

Baladoos

hany58

Any more opinions???
Any more please????

Unknown

Hany,
No one is gonna write in this subject because of the heading.

You need to find a creative title like
:Gorgeous beautiful women and their bodies
or.. Sex and the Catholic Church

If the topic sounds too serious, or spiritual, no one will respond, they only seem to respond to topics concerning monkeys, sex and pornography.

Well.. i don't know.. i could be wrong, but that's what i found!!!

Marianne87

All what I can say is rabna m3aak ya hany...really I hope that God stands by you and let your heart rejoice again. I guess nothing I can say will make anything better for you because all you want now is for your friends to love you again like old times...so nothing I can say will return that...but all I can do for you is just pray that this time passes so quickly and your sadness transform into happiness by the hand of God and God alone.
God Bless you,
Pray for me.

Unknown

hey,
firstly, read Psalm 34

secondly, feeling depressed or down is a normal emotion, its only when this normal emotion greatly impacts on the way you live your life, then it should be a concern and medical help should be sought
but what you are experiencing is grief, you feel you have lost someone close to you and thats what hurts you the most, the Lord does not want to see you this way

marianne is right, the only cure is reunited friendship with this girl and we cant provide that, we can only inspire you through our words to keep strong in your faith as you are

you sound like a fab person from your posts and i pray the lord guides you and supports you in your paths

take care and god bless

Unknown

I disagree. Depression is not the same as sadness or grief. Trust me. Nothing can take your joy away from u. Its from God.

If we have a relationship with Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit abides in us, then nothing can remove that joy from u.

You can be in "grief" and still have the joy of the Holy Spirit abiding in you. l.. Its not a relationship that's based on just emotions..that's like a "crush" - one day it comes and one day it goes... its deeper than that.

Believe me, i know this 110%. It sounds strange, but depression is something very very very bizarre.

What u have, must be sadness, your sorrowfulness; even grief or extreme sadness is OK... but depression ??

hany58

Lol that's quite right, but this person is really a lot for me, well i have to admit that this girl is the girl that I do love and losing her causes me a lot of sadness and grief, I wish that things will get better again, but really i can't do anything, I will try to talk with her and see exactly what is wrong with her. I need every prayer so please help me

Unknown

See! I told u it wasnt depression. When u reach the level of depression, then u can be sad. Don't worry Hany, after the rain comes, the sun will always shine.

hany58

;D ;D ;D thanks a lot for your help, i hope that everything will be ok and will get better. Thanks again for all your help vassilios and all the rest of that helped me, I really feel better now and i feel that i really have good friends that care about me

Baladoos

Unknown

Hi Hany,
Remember, whenever in doubt, contact your local certified sinner who is a professional, and can help define the difference between sadness and depression whenever u r not sure.
Glad to help Hany,
Call me on: 0800-SIN-NO-MORE

lobsh901

wow..... i'm touched. the same exact thing happened to me. EXACTLY. look.... you need to consider only the advice from ppl that u really admire and trust. and something else i learned.......
DON'T TELL ANYONE ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS TOWARD OTHER PPL. its a mistake. it will cause problems. trust me... i know!!! i've been in trouble for it before.

hany58

Lol don't worry at all, i never ever tell my feelings about other ppl to my friends, even if I trust them 100%, the reason for this is that it does causes a lot and lot of problems. I wish I can get all of that sorrow in my heart away, its killing me. Anyway guys please pray for me as hard as you can, it will help me a lot. Its so hard to love a best of yours, because this loves seems to ruin the friendship no matter how hard you try to make it separate from the friendship. I won't be upset if she doesn't love me back, its her full freedom and i do really respect it, but what really kills me is that the friendship is not going alright anymore, She is a very good friend of mine and losing her causes me to feel very bad. Please pray for me