yea I think I should do....I'm tired of thinking and I need a break actaully...please mention me in your prayers....I really really need it.....i'm going thru a hard time......and I really need the help of you guys.....so please help me if you can....
things have not changed, but rather they are getting worse :'( :'( :'(, i just found out that my best friend is in love with her too, and i can see that she is in love with him too..... :'( :'( :'( ahh well........idk what to say.....its just hurting me to death, i had a talk with my FOC and he said that I can say for sure that she has the same feelings for him, so i should just propose to her and see what she will say, if she says no, then i will know for sure that she doesn't like me....and if she says yes.....then.....well.....ofcourse you know, it will be happiest day of my life.....
My parents agree now about her, and my dad told me that I can propose to her if I want to, but like what i told you, things are getting worse, my best friend likes her, and i can see that she likes him too. When I had a talk to my FOC he told me that he doesn't think that she likes my best friend, they are just friend, then my FOC told me to propose to know a definite answer from her of whether she likes me or not. But If I propose I will break the heart of my best friend and lose him, simply because he likes her so much too, and I don't want to lose my best friend. I don't want to propose and then she says No and on the same time I will lose my best friend because he will know that I love the girl that he loves too. Things are just getting too messy, and I don't know what to do, its hurting me to death :'( :'( :'( :'( :'( :'(
ABOUNA..... telll Abouna about the problem, tell GOD the problem, and do what Abouna told you..... Abouna told you to propose, then i think you should, but you will always have the final word.... it is your life, not mine....
hey, sorry i didn't get to read all the replies on this post but when i read your question (no need to apologise because it is not inappropriate) i think you have not even talked to her about it. i don't know how do you assume she would refuse your proposal and on what basis did you suggest she treats you 'only like a brother and a friend' coptic girls and especially in church (i assume that's where you always meet her) are not exactly going to be very clear about their feelings to everyone. don't just assume stuff because the girl isn't flirting wth you (lol) she's just polite then hehe or shy.
firstly, talk to your FOC who know you well and can really tell if it is just a phase or if you really love her. then you can decide if you'll talk to her about it. so what she is 19, you can get engaged until she finishes uni and then get married. thats not the problem and you need a good long engagement for both of you to think everything over because marriage is for life.
good luck and i really hope that you'd get better and stop feeling down because it is not good for you. god bless
First of all u should know that this earth is not like for a million years for those who r flesh. Second of all as a christian u have to be careful not to turn anything adored into an object of idol. Third of all, God will give u a wife not like one u wish but out of His true care for ur salvation He will give u a real helper who will support u in the journey towards the promised land. Ask God of His Heanvenly Kingdom and be strong in ur spiritual life, the rest He will give u what u need(this may not be what u want). In my oppinion, u need to hold a fast. If it is the devil's snare ur fast and prayer will destroy it. If it is God's will u will get a clear message. But always remember whatever happens it does not matter as far as God is with u. If this girl is urs God will give her to u. If she is not urs she might be to ur friend or even another person. There r millions of girls u might like(even love) but only one is ur real wife. Stay in control always. Faith in God controls a christian.
At last I want to comment for all of us christians. Before we create by our own will and wish anything. Let us ask God's will first and foremost. We walk alone a long distance without telling a word to God but finally when our small seed grown up like a big tree and scares us we flee to God. Let us first always God His permission. "God, would You be happy and would it be for Your Glory and mine spiritual growth towards You? if I saw this seed I find?" This seed might be love, career, changing countries, college studies etc.....many steps we make. As a christian we r soldiers. Always careful of each step.
May God be with u always with His holiest mother, holy angels, saints. Amen!!!
[quote author=baladoos link=topic=6235.msg82293#msg82293 date=1203319592] Hi all, I really need some help with my story, I hope that it is approperiate to post it on this website but I really really need your opinions to help me.
I'm a 23 year old guy, working as an engineer and have a stable life. One of my best friends (a girl from church and she is 19) is a very close person to my heart, I do admit that I have feelings for her but there is a problem here: I know really well that this girl is not prepared for marriage at all, simply because she just finished high school and she is entering University, secondly is that I'm sure 100% that she considers me as only a brother and a good friend of her but nothing more. Thirdly I know that my parents will not be very happy if I get married to her. Now I'm not very sure about what to do, she is in the front of my eyes all the time simply because we are good friends and we are a part of a small group of youth in our church. She is also very nice to me (but only as a brother). What is upsetting me is that I cannot stop my feelings towards her and I feel that my feelings started to be like a line that is hanging me to it. Please I really really need your help with what to do because I personally don't know how to help myself and I feel very very depressed, because I feel that I want to talk to her a lot but on the same time I try to block it so that I don't develop more feelings for her, this tears me apart from inside, it causes me a lot to sit in my room depressed and cry, I prayed to God a lot to help me, but I'm just very bad and I start questioning God about why I loved this girl even though I'm sure that we will never get married, I sometimes ask about about why he didn't make this girl as only a friend to me?. I really really apologize if this topic is not approperiate to be posted on this website, please tell me if this topic is not approperiate and I will delete it,
thanks
alright man this is what you do......first you have to pray so hard like you literally have to pray hard enough you cry or you feel guilty. God answers when he thinks it is right, he comes when you need him most. I totally agree with the others that you should see your father of confession but dont give up. Ask him as many questions that are on your mind. listen to this carefully EVEN IF YOU FORGET SOME QUESTIONS DO NOT LEAVE STAY AND THINK UNTILL YOU FIGURE IT OUT. I mean its not like abouna is going to tell you leave. Also, try to ask him if that is an appropriate topic to fast and pray on.
Comments
thanks
firstly, talk to your FOC who know you well and can really tell if it is just a phase or if you really love her.
then you can decide if you'll talk to her about it. so what she is 19, you can get engaged until she finishes uni and then get married. thats not the problem and you need a good long engagement for both of you to think everything over because marriage is for life.
good luck and i really hope that you'd get better and stop feeling down because it is not good for you. god bless
baladoos,
First of all u should know that this earth is not like for a million years for those who r flesh. Second of all as a christian u have to be careful not to turn anything adored into an object of idol. Third of all, God will give u a wife not like one u wish but out of His true care for ur salvation He will give u a real helper who will support u in the journey towards the promised land. Ask God of His Heanvenly Kingdom and be strong in ur spiritual life, the rest He will give u what u need(this may not be what u want).
In my oppinion, u need to hold a fast. If it is the devil's snare ur fast and prayer will destroy it. If it is God's will u will get a clear message.
But always remember whatever happens it does not matter as far as God is with u. If this girl is urs God will give her to u. If she is not urs she might be to ur friend or even another person. There r millions of girls u might like(even love) but only one is ur real wife.
Stay in control always. Faith in God controls a christian.
At last I want to comment for all of us christians. Before we create by our own will and wish anything. Let us ask God's will first and foremost. We walk alone a long distance without telling a word to God but finally when our small seed grown up like a big tree and scares us we flee to God. Let us first always God His permission. "God, would You be happy and would it be for Your Glory and mine spiritual growth towards You? if I saw this seed I find?" This seed might be love, career, changing countries, college studies etc.....many steps we make. As a christian we r soldiers. Always careful of each step.
May God be with u always with His holiest mother, holy angels, saints. Amen!!!
Dude, this girl is probably on her 3rd divorce by now with at least 10 kids. Man, come on... snap out of it buddy.
There's more fish in the sea my man,
Remember when I told u about putting a buteekha sefy in your stomach? Did u do it?
Listen, if you don't have closure, do u want me to call her for u?
Hi all,
I really need some help with my story, I hope that it is approperiate to post it on this website but I really really need your opinions to help me.
I'm a 23 year old guy, working as an engineer and have a stable life. One of my best friends (a girl from church and she is 19) is a very close person to my heart, I do admit that I have feelings for her but there is a problem here: I know really well that this girl is not prepared for marriage at all, simply because she just finished high school and she is entering University, secondly is that I'm sure 100% that she considers me as only a brother and a good friend of her but nothing more. Thirdly I know that my parents will not be very happy if I get married to her. Now I'm not very sure about what to do, she is in the front of my eyes all the time simply because we are good friends and we are a part of a small group of youth in our church. She is also very nice to me (but only as a brother). What is upsetting me is that I cannot stop my feelings towards her and I feel that my feelings started to be like a line that is hanging me to it. Please I really really need your help with what to do because I personally don't know how to help myself and I feel very very depressed, because I feel that I want to talk to her a lot but on the same time I try to block it so that I don't develop more feelings for her, this tears me apart from inside, it causes me a lot to sit in my room depressed and cry, I prayed to God a lot to help me, but I'm just very bad and I start questioning God about why I loved this girl even though I'm sure that we will never get married, I sometimes ask about about why he didn't make this girl as only a friend to me?. I really really apologize if this topic is not approperiate to be posted on this website, please tell me if this topic is not approperiate and I will delete it,
thanks
alright man this is what you do......first you have to pray so hard like you literally have to pray hard enough you cry or you feel guilty. God answers when he thinks it is right, he comes when you need him most. I totally agree with the others that you should see your father of confession but dont give up. Ask him as many questions that are on your mind. listen to this carefully EVEN IF YOU FORGET SOME QUESTIONS DO NOT LEAVE STAY AND THINK UNTILL YOU FIGURE IT OUT. I mean its not like abouna is going to tell you leave. Also, try to ask him if that is an appropriate topic to fast and pray on.