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Conversion
I had been talking in length to an inquiring friend (who is quite involved for a unbeliever in my Universities Christian club/group/society), who says he has accepted Christianity- but the specifics, like chastity and "the rules", they are preventing him from becoming Christian. And when I asked about what is the purpose of the rules- he answered well, saying obviously to keep us from harm (which is sometimes for a rascal for me, something I have trouble believing in times). I told him flat out that Christianity is about not being your own god, knowing full well that when you do so you make a mess of things. But I found it difficult to say on the one hand that chastity (something I am struggling myself) is not the essence of Christianity but on the other that it is an inevitable call of a Christian.
It obviously should not stop him from becoming a Christian- but it is obviously a delusion to think that you can continue to be your own god once becoming a Christian. What do you think? I showed him the chapter of chastity from C.S. Lewis's 'Mere Christianity' (I am seriously fawning over that nugget of wisdom) but I don't know...it's just odd that I or he should focus on the chastity... Like his Christianity would not mean something, I think, if he choose to resist that call on the outset. But then again, I resist the Holy Spirit myself, and I have faith that God will purify my heart so I would not be such a hot head, and be more malleable to His will. What I guess I am saying is, there is conflict with me, because I think that in forming a genuine relationship with Christ he will inevitable take the call for chastity seriously. What should I advise him?
Comments
I think first and foremost, there needs to be a great deal of prayer on your part. I know this is a fairly standard, boring answer, but you'd be surprised how much good it can do. I agree with you. Remember that YOU are his example and that you are now partly responsible for him before God. I know that may sound intimidating, but this is great news for you. I think the best way of seeing how good an example you're setting for your friend is by looking at your own spiritual growth - THIS IS WHAT'S IMPORTANT.
If you are remembering this person daily in your prayers and you are growing spiritually, then be assured that you're doing everything you can for your friend - don't worry about HIS spiritual growth, because that's where God does His part, provided that you are faithful in your end of the deal.
If you feel that this responsibility is too much, then simply ask someone else to help you! For example, asking your father of confession to speak to this person, which is exactly how I approached my own similar situation. As for what to specifically advise your friend, I think that you should point out to them that chastity is simply a very SMALL part of the bigger picture of Christianity. Yes it's important, but so are many other things. Like you said, I think he will appreciate its importance as he progresses spiritually.
I think at the end of the day, if you approach the situation with love and honesty and do your own part, God will multiply your efforts and you'll soon see the fruits of your labours.
I don't know if any of this is useful to you, I hope it is. Just my view on things - good luck and may God bless your efforts!
I'm in a very similar situation myself. When you say he has accepted Christianity, do you mean that he now believes in God whereas before he didn't? "Accepting" Christianity implies that you accept all the "rules" of Christianity...so I'm just a little confused!
Haha. I am not sure myself. That is why I said "he says he has accepted...". Which makes things rather difficult. I suppose apart from what you have said, any talk should clarify what his vision of Christianity really is. It is not that I believe I have a terribly clearer picture, but I think by now I should be able by the grace of God to offer better guideposts.
And for the rest of what you said, it is both kind of obvious, yet something that somehow completely escapes you when you're put in the situation. So, thank you brother.