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PLZ PLZ ANSWER

Basant TawfikBasant Tawfik
edited December 1969 in Personal Issues
Hey u guys!!! i know personal issues are supposed to be about myself, but this isn't it is about my friend! My friend has a huge problem!Yes my friend is a Coptic Orthodox Christian and sooo r my friend's family!!the parents hate each other!! they want a divorce but as u know in our religion u can't!! but the very bad thing is that they show it to their children!!! they fight all the time!! their house is never quiet!!! Sometimes my friend feels like commiting suicide!!!my friend has prayed to God and read in the bible!!! and also my friend has talked to them!!! but they don't care!!! also my friend's siblings r tired of it too!! they talk to them they pray they read the bible and also talked to abouna but nothing!!! nothing has changed!!! can u plz plz give me advice to tell my friend!!! plz u guys i am worried!!!!!  

Comments

  • jydeaconjydeacon
    This is a difficult situation to advize on and its not easy to even help them with. I suggest you talk to them and let them know you are there for them and if they ever need anything from you that you will do your best to help them in whatever you can. Just tell them to keep praying that God instils peace once again in the house, and you of course also pray for them constantly. Also ask them to listen to hymns when they hear their parents fighting, and sing with it if they can, maybe if their parents hear them singing they will be embarassed to fight infront of the kids and eventually learn to stop. Hope this is somewhat helpful.

    God Bless and Pray for me and my weakness
  • Basant TawfikBasant Tawfik
    [quote author=jydeacon link=topic=6912.msg92554#msg92554 date=1215744929]
    This is a difficult situation to advize on and its not easy to even help them with. I suggest you talk to them and let them know you are there for them and if they ever need anything from you that you will do your best to help them in whatever you can. Just tell them to keep praying that God instils peace once again in the house, and you of course also pray for them constantly. Also ask them to listen to hymns when they hear their parents fighting, and sing with it if they can, maybe if their parents hear them singing they will be embarassed to fight infront of the kids and eventually learn to stop. Hope this is somewhat helpful.

    God Bless and Pray for me and my weakness


    it does help but a little i did tell my friend to pray and wen u say talk to them do u mean talk to my friend or my friend and family? cuz if it is my friend's family that i should talk to they won't listen and ecpecialy the father!! they will yell at me and say that it is none of my busines!!! but i like the hymn part that u mentioned!!!
  • jydeaconjydeacon
    I meant talk to the kids, yeah don't talk to the parents cause it really isn't your business to get involved even if its to help.
  • Basant TawfikBasant Tawfik
    [quote author=jydeacon link=topic=6912.msg92556#msg92556 date=1215749537]
    I meant talk to the kids, yeah don't talk to the parents cause it really isn't your business to get involved even if its to help.


    i did talk to the kids
  • Unknown
    [quote author=*Thirsty+For+Christ* link=topic=6912.msg92551#msg92551 date=1215742978]
    Hey u guys!!! i know personal issues are supposed to be about myself, but this isn't it is about my friend! My friend has a huge problem!Yes my friend is a Coptic Orthodox Christian and sooo r my friend's family!!the parents hate each other!! they want a divorce but as u know in our religion u can't!! but the very bad thing is that they show it to their children!!! they fight all the time!! their house is never quiet!!! Sometimes my friend feels like commiting suicide!!!my friend has prayed to God and read in the bible!!! and also my friend has talked to them!!! but they don't care!!! also my friend's siblings r tired of it too!! they talk to them they pray they read the bible and also talked to abouna but nothing!!! nothing has changed!!! can u plz plz give me advice to tell my friend!!! plz u guys i am worried!!!!! 


    Well, somehow, you must convince your friend that the dispute or lack of love between their parents is no fault of their own. Its a very hurtful situation when there is no peace in the family, i'm sure; but they must understand that.

    Also, why not get abouna to come and see them?? He should pass by, talk to them.

    We, as a Church, only believe in Divorce for 1 of 2 reasons:
    a) Adultary
    b) Lying before marriage (as far as I know). .i.e. if a man married a woman, who she found it later on he was alraedy married, or he had committed a murder WITHOUT telling her, then this can be a case for annulment. I don't think that this even constitutes divorce. The Church just nullify the marriage (as if it never happened).
  • Unknown
    [quote author=jydeacon link=topic=6912.msg92556#msg92556 date=1215749537]
    I meant talk to the kids, yeah don't talk to the parents cause it really isn't your business to get involved even if its to help.


    I agree 110% with such advice.. I strongly suggest u take it also. Its essential that u do not interefere between them when they argue, but there's nothing stopping you from going over to their house and seeing your friend. Nor is there anything stopping you from bringing Christ in that family, by reading the Bible with them, or praying with them.

    Interferring in an argument is NOT what I'm suggesting here.. AT ALL.. far from it. And I agree with JY. Do not get involved. But, if you can, try to bring some spirituality to their home.
  • Basant TawfikBasant Tawfik
    Hey does anyone else have any suggestions!?!?!
  • godislove260godislove260
    A friend of mine went through the same thing a while ago, and it ended in a separation..
    I'm sorry, it's not my intention to discourage you, but this girl had also tried everything: talking, getting abouna, ... and nothing helped. I mean to say that sometimes separation is inevitable and it might be better for the children than to see their parents fighting all the time, cuz, judging by the experience of my friend, that was more hurtful than them actually being seperated... I mean she got used to it after a while...

    God Bless
    Please pray for me
  • Basant TawfikBasant Tawfik
    [quote author=godislove260 link=topic=6912.msg92629#msg92629 date=1215872876]
    A friend of mine went through the same thing a while ago, and it ended in a separation..
    I'm sorry, it's not my intention to discourage you, but this girl had also tried everything: talking, getting abouna, ... and nothing helped. I mean to say that sometimes separation is inevitable and it might be better for the children than to see their parents fighting all the time, cuz, judging by the experience of my friend, that was more hurtful than them actually being seperated... I mean she got used to it after a while...

    God Bless
    Please pray for me


    My friend wishes that they would seperate!! my friend said it would still hurt but it is better than to see them fighting!!!
  • copticcross3copticcross3
    yeah..there isn't much to do ...This is a really bad situation because she has no part in it let alone you so you can't exactly help solve it...
    i think her parents are just going to have to work it out together...eventually

    but i think one of the most important things is to remind her that it is in no way form or shape her fault...and her parents probbly do love her so remind her of that tooo...
    also in the meantime...spend a lot of time with her ...take her to church..invite her to your house and try to keep her mind off of itt
    :/
    i know that isn't much help at all..but tha tis most likey what i would do...
    and i know what it's like...i've had friends(non-orthodox) in the same situation... but probably a lot worse..
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