Coptic Orthodox dating a non-christian person

mtfahmy

Hi,

I am wondering if you could help me with some bible verses that I could use to convince a christian orthodox girl not to date a non-christian person.  I am worried because she is under 20 years old.  I have been reminding her about her first love to God, when she used to drop everything for her prayers at certain times.  Now she is in love with non-christian person and no personal meetings with God.  I don't want to talk to her father of confession.  I think it is up to her to discuss it or not.

peterfarrington

It is hard to persuade a person who has already made up their minds to a dangerous course of action. And of course prayer for such a person as well as gentle reminders of the life she once lived are powerful.

But there is the verse which is a command..

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. 2 Cor 6:14

To be in a romantic and loving relationship with someone binds us to them in very intimate spiritual and psychological ways, and if the other person is an unbeliever then we cannot help be pulled away from a complete devotion to Christ. I think this verse pictures two oxen or bullocks tied together in a plough where one is large and the other small, and the small ox has no choice in the direction it will go as the big ox dominates. In an ideal Orthodox relationship both partners are seeking to serve God as well as their partner, and their is a fruitful balance. But to be in a relationship with even a supportive non-Christian partner is difficult, and is much more liable to cause the Orthodox Christian to fall away, certainly from a life of devotion. The committed Christian is always the little ox in such a relationship because it is not possible to make a non-Christian participate in spiritual exercises, but it is always possible for a Christian to participate in non-spiritual things like shopping, going for a drive, doing decorating. And these are all innocuous in themselves, certainly not evil, but they chip away at the spiritual life of the Orthodox partner.

The Church has always sought to protect her children from such situations for their own good. It is not possible for an Orthodox Christian in such a relationship to have an Orthodox marriage because it is a sacrament that requires both parties to be Orthodox. What would a marriage service with a non-Christian contain - I could imagine a meaningful, serious and spiritual marriage between even an Orthodox and a non-Orthodox, though this is also problematic, but at least the prayers of the marriage service would be offered by both parties. A marriage service between an Orthodox and a non-Orthodox would have to exclude God in some real sense, because one partner would not be able to offer an Amen to the prayers being prayed.

Pray and fast for your friend. Prayer works, in God's way and in God's time. Continue to keep reminding her by your own life of what she has forsaken. Invite her to some Church events, even non-prayer ones.

May God bless your concern for your friend.

Father Peter

mtfahmy

Thank you Father.

I will send her the verse by email as I had no chance to see her lately.  My house will be fasting and praying for her. I know God could change all things around and that is my hope

Pray for us.

MF

socoolbishoy

with all honesty if a person chose such a way already, verses are non-sense to them!!!


many other ways to approach this!

mtfahmy

I agree. 

However, if God was able to raise the dead, he would be able to change the hearts.  St. Monica prayed for her son many years and God changed him. 

I will keep praying and wait for God's work in her.

geomike

I will pray that God will give her the right intentions.

Ioannes

yes prayer is essential. maybe this will be a learning experience for her, maybe the non-christian person will see the truth. who knows, God willing everything will be ok

patman98

Yes, there are many possibilities, Through prayer and fasting she does what is right, the verse reminds her of the life she left behind and changes her way, or the man finds the correct path. Either way, withh patience and prayer, she will return to God.
Have Faith,
Patrick