Silence

TITL

What is the secret to silence? (besides the obvious.. ie prayer, fasting..etc)

Sometimes, k not sometimes.. all the time.., I feel like I talk way toooo much, and not even in a good way! A lot of what I say is idle and most definitely not useful.
I will be held accountable for each and every word that is uttered out of my mouth. What a scary thought!
So this fast I am really trying to control my tongue... although, sometimes when I am with my friends, I feel like I get a little carried away, and just start talking about things that don't benefit me in any way. I think I get this from my older brother, who NEVER stops talking lol. Seeee, there I go again with the talking! Clearly I need help.

Any advice is appreciated :)

abanoub2000

Hey! I have a HUGE problem trying to watch my mouth! So praying and fasting and READING the bible obviously. But here is what i did

1. I always tried to give myself something to do. (if i am reading, writing, studying, watching copitc youtube videos I dont talk)
2. I almost NEVER start a conversation, I know it's weird but everytime i started a conversation it was about something dumb like poop lol
3. I found that I only say these stupid things to certain friends, so I would try to keep my distance from them.
4. (this one is gonna sound really creepy) During my freshman year if i had to start a conversation I used to keep a list of relevant conversation starters in my pocket lol
5. I talked to JULIE! (sunday school teacher) So find your sunday school teacher and talk to them. (remember just because they are not abouna doesn't mean the holy spirit doesn't work in them they are god's servants just like abouna dont disregard what they have to say like i used to)

I hope I helped a little :D

God Bless,
Abanoub

TITL

[quote author=abanoub2000 link=topic=8899.msg111380#msg111380 date=1267479707]

1. I always tried to give myself something to do. (if i am reading, writing, studying, watching copitc youtube videos I dont talk)


Yeah the problem isn't when I'm home (unless I'm chatting online lol) it's when im at school or at church..

[quote author=abanoub2000 link=topic=8899.msg111380#msg111380 date=1267479707]
2. I almost NEVER start a conversation, I know it's weird but everytime i started a conversation it was about something dumb like poop lol


I tried doing that too... but then I ALWAYS remember the most crucial thing in the world, and I end up starting the conversation lol

[quote author=abanoub2000 link=topic=8899.msg111380#msg111380 date=1267479707]
3. I found that I only say these stupid things to certain friends, so I would try to keep my distance from them.


Man... your askin the impossible here loool, but seriously.. keeping distance from my friends is even HARDER than shutting up when I'm around them. I'd rather just stand next to them and be silent the whole time lol. Don't separate me from my peeps lol

[quote author=abanoub2000 link=topic=8899.msg111380#msg111380 date=1267479707]
4. (this one is gonna sound really creepy) During my freshman year if i had to start a conversation I used to keep a list of relevant conversation starters in my pocket lol


haha like what? "what are the answers to the homework?" :P

[quote author=abanoub2000 link=topic=8899.msg111380#msg111380 date=1267479707]
5. I talked to JULIE! (sunday school teacher) So find your sunday school teacher and talk to them. (remember just because they are not abouna doesn't mean the holy spirit doesn't work in them they are god's servants just like abouna dont disregard what they have to say like i used to)


Yeah I talked to abouna.. he said to pray.

abanoub2000

haha yeah I didnt wanna talk to my abouna because I was possotive he would give me that generic 'pray and fast' answer but with a sunday school servant will sympathize better since they are closer to your age and were educated here.

Abounasarecool

count to ten before u say something lololol

childoforthodoxy

My dear brothers and sisters in Christ,

I hope that this message finds you well. I think that it is important that we discuss some things about this topic in general, so that we may all benefit during this time of the Great Lent in our journey towards our Lord. In reading some of the comments within this topic, I have come to realize something which I feel needs some clarification. I truly ask for all of your forgiveness before I continue typing this, as I am the least of you, but wish to grow spiritually together with you all, as we are all members in the Body of Christ.

Over the years, we have grown so accustomed to providing "fasting and prayer" as methods towards overcoming our struggles, whatever they might be for each of us as individuals. Certainly, these in conjunction with "reading the Bible" have often been used in Sunday School classes and their counterparts in general Church instructional classes, and have over time been demeaned to what is now termed to be "canned answers." Unfortunately, because we think of them as "canned answers," we feel that the power that we may find within them is minimal, being such trivial and common things, things that have been told to us since we were children. We feel that, if we were told this as children, and we are no longer children, that there must be some new, untold methods and mechanisms by which we can overcome our struggles in our attempting to defeat our own selfish wills and the powers of the enemy. But is this really the case?

It is in things that appear to be so "simple" that we find the answer to our struggles, and indeed, find them to be more complex than we once imagined them. When I stand for prayer, do I simply stand there, legs incredibly relaxed, in a half daze, asking God quickly, "God, I speak too much. Help me overcome this. Amen"? Do not misunderstand me, there is nothing wrong with short and pointed prayers, which may prove in fact to be quite useful in most of the situations in our lives, but... is the intent behind our prayer there? Do I truly have the faith that if I pray for this, and trust in God, and place my hope in Him, that He will strengthen me in my struggles... or do I pray as though it is something required of me, something that I have been told to do, something that functions only as an addition to the other multitudes of pieces of advice that I have received over the years? Is prayer only the icing on the cake? Our most saintly desert fathers of the Church struggled for years with some sins, and I am sure that they tried as best as they could to pray earnestly to overcome their weaknesses with Christ working within them. Do I show even a fraction of this zeal when trying to overcome something? Do I ask God to help strengthen me as though I am ordering something of a menu at a fast food restaurant, and once it is not provided, simply walk away?

What about fasting? When I fast, do I only do so in a manner in which I simply become a vegan? Is food the focus of my fast? For some of us, it may be, as we all struggle with trying to control our stomachs, but is this where the power of the fast stops? We are blessed by our glorious Church to be offered throughout the Lent a Fraction in the Liturgy which shows the power of fasting and prayer. Are these only words? Are these only stories that I was taught as a child, and now that I know them, I put them aside? How is it that Jesus Christ Himself showed us this way, showed us how to both fast and pray, and we throw these tools of our spiritual growth to the side?

Do I read the Bible on a daily basis? Am I reading the Bible simply to read the Bible without attempting to benefit anything from it? Do I read the Bible at all? The Bible is filled with ways that I may overcome many of the struggles I face in my life. Do I seek understanding from the Bible in the words of the Fathers of the Church, from my own father of confession, from my spiritual guides, from reading as much as I can, not simply for the attainment of knowledge but for the true modification of my will and my practices.

It is in these "canned answers" that we find true power. It is these tools that Christ has blessed us with. Often, I find that we seek other supplementary ways to overcome our struggles, but do these become the main focus rather than the supplement? Dare I ask... am I simply attempting to modify my actions, but do so without Christ truly working with me because I don't seek after the ways that He has provided for me.

Let us not lose sight of the glorious Power the Christ bestows on us when we seek after Him. Prayer brings me closer to God. Fasting helps me to control myself and seek after our Lord. The Bible is God's revelation to us, showing us the way to His Kingdom with the guidance of the Holy Spirit in both the Church and our selves as individuals, not simply one or the other. I may learn of other ways to add upon this foundation, but let us not lose the foundation. Christ is our foundation and has shown us the way towards him. Let us not ignore this.

Pray for my weaknesses,
childoforthodoxy

TITL

Thank you for these wise words! This is definitely a wake up call!!

I appreciate and agree with everything you have said.  

God bless you childoforthodoxy!!

ilovesaintmark

the desert fathers would at times put rocks in their mouth to keep from uttering words.  I sometimes do that with the olive pits or large fruit pits after I eat my meals.  Although for someone young or not well coordinated, this could be dangerous towards a choking episode.