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Is this from the Devil?
Hi,
I am really curious about this:
One day I was at Church and a deacon asked me if I could read the Epistle. I said "OH no... not saint Paul.. its too confusing. He's so philosophical. 'I am, we are, therefore, I am' .
I think actually, it was the Acts or something to do with Saint Paul.
I get lost in most of his books. Anyway, the man insisted (because I speak good English), and I went ahead to read.
Saint Paul, in the Epistle, was talking to someone called Festus. The letter started as follows:
"O Great Festus!".
As I was reading, I felt, or thought I heard myself say "O Great Fetus"
I paused for a moment. I looked at everyone, and everyone looked OK. No one laughed.. and I thought to myself "OK.. cool, i didnt say anything wrong".
As I was reading, this voice in my head just screamed at me saying "FETUS! FETUS! FETUS!! FETUS"
The voices got louder and louder..my reading pace slowed down as I tried to subconsiously hide this voice. I couldnt..it was amazing. Like someone was talking to me to me in my head, and he (or SHE!) didnt want to be ignored.
My reading pace about half way through was getting to the point of kiddy style reading.. and I was trying, with all my might not to let a smirk or a hint of a giggle appear on my face.
As I was reading, and saying his name, i had to make the physical effort to accentuate Festus's name. I kept on saying "FeSStuss .. FesssSSSStuss". I really over-pronounced the middle "S" in his name so much, i was beginning to feel stupid just doing that.
It was a hard Epistle to read.. but I did it.. until something weired happened.
Saint Paul, as he was talking to this FeStus guy, seemed a bit upset with FeStus. Then this voice said to me "At least my mom didn't call me FeStus!"
I brushed away that thought INSTANTLY. I didnt allow that sentence to breed in my head. I still managed to survive without laughing. I finally finished reading. I went down to the toilets INSTANTLY, and i broke out in tears of laughter like a madman.
I feel really bad about that. I really feel it wasn't me at all talking to myself. I felt.. I couldnt have been that funny whilst concentrating on reading the Bible?
Who was that in my head talking to me?
I am really curious about this:
One day I was at Church and a deacon asked me if I could read the Epistle. I said "OH no... not saint Paul.. its too confusing. He's so philosophical. 'I am, we are, therefore, I am' .
I think actually, it was the Acts or something to do with Saint Paul.
I get lost in most of his books. Anyway, the man insisted (because I speak good English), and I went ahead to read.
Saint Paul, in the Epistle, was talking to someone called Festus. The letter started as follows:
"O Great Festus!".
As I was reading, I felt, or thought I heard myself say "O Great Fetus"
I paused for a moment. I looked at everyone, and everyone looked OK. No one laughed.. and I thought to myself "OK.. cool, i didnt say anything wrong".
As I was reading, this voice in my head just screamed at me saying "FETUS! FETUS! FETUS!! FETUS"
The voices got louder and louder..my reading pace slowed down as I tried to subconsiously hide this voice. I couldnt..it was amazing. Like someone was talking to me to me in my head, and he (or SHE!) didnt want to be ignored.
My reading pace about half way through was getting to the point of kiddy style reading.. and I was trying, with all my might not to let a smirk or a hint of a giggle appear on my face.
As I was reading, and saying his name, i had to make the physical effort to accentuate Festus's name. I kept on saying "FeSStuss .. FesssSSSStuss". I really over-pronounced the middle "S" in his name so much, i was beginning to feel stupid just doing that.
It was a hard Epistle to read.. but I did it.. until something weired happened.
Saint Paul, as he was talking to this FeStus guy, seemed a bit upset with FeStus. Then this voice said to me "At least my mom didn't call me FeStus!"
I brushed away that thought INSTANTLY. I didnt allow that sentence to breed in my head. I still managed to survive without laughing. I finally finished reading. I went down to the toilets INSTANTLY, and i broke out in tears of laughter like a madman.
I feel really bad about that. I really feel it wasn't me at all talking to myself. I felt.. I couldnt have been that funny whilst concentrating on reading the Bible?
Who was that in my head talking to me?
Comments
Were you in a position where if you hadn't started thinking about it like that you would have thought more about the words you were reading? The devil seems to plan what he does so that it works out like that.
But usually, in any situation, when you make a conscious effort not to think about it, you're kind of just decreasing your chances of forgetting. So, in a sense, maybe you were trying too hard.
Its as if the voice in my head new that Saint Paul, in that chapter, was arguing with Festus, and was making side comments. That's really weired.
Who could that be?
It was Satan, no doubt. He planted a seed, and then one's own mind takes off. The devil is on the attack at all times, especially in the Church. I've seen some pretty interesting fights in the church during liturgy.
Were you vested at the time?...while reading...
Zoxsasi,
It was Satan, no doubt. He planted a seed, and then one's own mind takes off. The devil is on the attack at all times, especially in the Church. I've seen some pretty interesting fights in the church during liturgy.
Were you vested at the time?...while reading...
Yeah , of course.
Oh gosh!!
The other thing that he [Satan] imparted was to let you think that the run to the toilet will clear things. I know this is going to sound harsh, but, it is a sort of desecration (wearing your tonia into the toilet or for that matter leaving the Liturgy)-that is what he [Satan] wanted.
Be on guard, my friend. Not to elevate you, but to point out the obvious, as you become more charged into your spiritual life and to discover, learn, and expound, he attacks [Satan] in a myriad of ways. He [Satan] wants to bring you down.
Zoxsasi,
The other thing that he [Satan] imparted was to let you think that the run to the toilet will clear things. I know this is going to sound harsh, but, it is a sort of desecration (wearing your tonia into the toilet or for that matter leaving the Liturgy)-that is what he [Satan] wanted.
Be on guard, my friend. Not to elevate you, but to point out the obvious, as you become more charged into your spiritual life and to discover, learn, and expound, he attacks [Satan] in a myriad of ways. He [Satan] wants to bring you down.
That no good diabolical devil got me! He good me good and proper. But he's goin down!!
Dude, I had NO other choice... I felt I needed to explode with laughter. I mean; i could just about control it.
Darn. I knew it was from Shooshoo. Shooshoo always does stuff like this to me.. and I think the idea to tell others about the iPhone4 was from him also.
What was i meant to do??
Don't worry about the iPhone thing. I have done worse things.
The whole point of the issue was that he [Satan] would make you feel uncomfortable and embarassed so that the next time you may be hesitant to read at the lecturn.
Possible alternatives to having made "the run":
--go to the altar and kiss it
--look at Christ the Enthroned in the apse of the altar (the Pantokrator)
--get singing in one of the chants and let out the smile; this expression of the smile would actually wind up being a catalyst for others to enjoy the given chant 'thinking that the smile came from being enchanted by the chant'.
--tell your priest (the servant of the day) to make a sign of the cross on your forehead.
Again, don't worry about the iPhone. Minagir is just upset that you gave it out to a 100 people and you didn't have one for him.
I got a free iPhone the other day and I returned it to the person. It does not work on the Verizon network. I'm stuck with my blackberry for now.
Maybe having the blackberry will be better. Let say someone shoots at me with a gun (I know there are a list of people who would love to do that), the blackberry has more meat in it to stop a bullet than a thin iPhone.
"Be on guard..." I think that warning is not just to remind us of the Second Coming of Our Lord, but that paranthetically it also means to watch out that the devil is trying to keep us from recognizing our responsibility.
I have goofed up in church plenty of times, but you shake off the embarassment, and get back to serving that day.
Let's be practical and give practical advice here buddy.. when such a situation happens, what you have suggested are not going to be the obvious things to do? Are they?
I even applied the wisdom of John Chrysostom who said that you cannot stop the birds from flying above you, but you can stop them from landing on your head. I brushed away these voices in my head, and it still didnt work.
Maybe it didnt work because I was agreeing with them. I was maybe saying to myself "Hey.. what kind of person would call their son Fetus?"
Maybe I was thinking that???!!
Im not sure.
It is obvious actually. These are very practical. The things I mentioned are very close and near at hand when in a troubled situation. You can consider as emergency functionalities.