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seriously considering it.
I am seriously considering suicide. I have many internal issues that I can't discuss with anyone that I have been struggling with and I really can't handle it anymore. Please pray for me.
Comments
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=11866.msg141577#msg141577 date=1310773601]
I wrote a short story about this. It's titled Suicide. It will come out in a week or so...definitely before August 10th. I will send you the link to it when it does come out. I hope that you would take the time to read the story and think about the message in it and decide against doing something like that. Please don't do it. If you understand Arabic, listen to this...it's powerful...and very comforting.
"But he who endures to the end shall be saved." (Matthew 24:13, NKJV)
Prayers of the saints be with you and comfort you.
Why can't you discuss those issues with anyone? Alot of people are forgiving so please try. You need support Godlovesme. The internal stuggles are obstacles you need help with. Fear is large for some, so please try to fight it. Satan kills what we love. He hates that we commune with others with love and understanding. His desire is the hate of love. If you are depressed then maybe you get angry and people don't respond the way you would like them too, they don't understand. I wish I was there to support you.
"I, even I, am he who comforts you.
Who are you that you should be afraid
Of a man who will die,
And of the son of man who will be made like grass?
And you forget the Lord your Maker,
Who stretched out the heavens
And laid out the foundations of the earth;
You have feared continually every day
Because of the fury of the oppressor,
When he has prepared to destroy
And where is the fury of the oppressor?
Isaiah 51 12:13 Satan destroys the ones we love.
My heart goes out to you. May God give you relieve from your stuggles.
Do not lose heart, O soul, do not grieve;
Pronounce not over thyself a final judgment for the multitude of thy sins;
Do not commit thyself to the fire; do not say: The Lord has cast me from His face.
Such words are not pleasing to God. Can it be that he who has fallen cannot get up? Can it be that he who has turned away cannot turn back again? Dost thou not hear how kind the Father is to a prodigal?
Do not be ashamed to turn back and say boldly: I will arise and go to my Father. Arise and go!
He will accept thee and will not reproach thee, but rather rejoice at thy return. He awaits thee; just do not be ashamed and do not hide from the face of God as did Adam.
It was for thy sake that Christ was crucified; so will He cast thee aside? He knows who oppresses us. He knows that we have no other help but Him alone.
Christ knows that man is miserable. Do not give thyself up to despair and apathy, assuming that thou hast been prepared for the fire. Christ derives no consolation from thrusting us into the fire; He gains nothing if He sends us into the abyss to be tormented.
Imitate the prodigal son; leave the city that starves thee. Come and beseech Him and thou shalt behold the glory of God. Thy face shall be enlightened and thou wilt rejoice in the sweetness of paradise. Glory to the Lord and Lover of mankind who saves us!
God be with you. He really does love you. :)
I hope all is well and that you are feeling better,
sometimes letting people know how you feel is a way to get a relief and a peace of mind. But most importantly let God know how you feel-
"Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:28 -30
Committing suicide is not a solution to an issue that God is capable of handling, please get whats in your heart out to God and someone who can be trusted so you can live the life God has planned for you.
You are GOD's beloved no matter what anyone may say or the world might say,cause we are living for the Heavenly Kingdom not the worldly.
Be strong-cause if God is with you who can be against you.
Here is a sermon that might help:
http://orthodoxsermons.org/sermons/finding-joy-part-1
Your sister in Christ,
May the prayers of those who pleased God from the beginning be with us all AMEN
Once you decide to cut that breath, you cut every chance of hope.
I don't care how bad your life is, you are still an individual created by God Himself...and you have a purpose in this life. You have a role to play in this world, and you can't just give up. You have so much to live for, and you don't even know it.
Christ died...so that you don't have to.
If you choose to cut short your life which God gave you, you lose every chance of living forever with God Himself.
You have one life that is given to you. Make the most out of it.
Whatever situation you are in, it will pass. Nothing lasts forever.
Hang in there, life will get better...trust me it always passes.
Don't you want to see what your life will be like in 20 years? Don't you want to see your kids? Your grandkids? Your spouse?
Don't give up. Think of the endless pain your loved ones will have to live with. You'll torture them, and you'll make them hate themselves for the rest of their lives.
Find your purpose in life. Ask God to guide you through this struggle.
Life is short enough. People die in famines, and in wars, and from all types of diseases. And you want to throw away your precious life.
Please contact your Father of confession, or the Priest at your local Church ASAP and tell him how you feel. You won't be the first person to share that with him either.
Cry out to the Lord with all your heart. Pray with tears to the One Who suffered for our sake. Pray to Him and say "Lord Help!" as if you were drowning, and He will hear His precious child. He will give comfort to the one He made with His own hands.
"In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul." (Psalm 94:19)
Killing yourself and throwing away it all way isn't worth it...period. Live the life that you have, and be thankful for it. Because as bad as it may be, you still have ten fingers and you're still breathing.
(Private message me if you want to talk)
May God give you His peace and grant you His grace and abundance for the rest of your life.
+++
I am seriously considering suicide. I have many internal issues that I can't discuss with anyone that I have been struggling with and I really can't handle it anymore. Please pray for me.
Why can't you discuss anything with anyone? We are always here. We don't know what your real identity is so you don't need to be embarassed, all we know you as is our brother GodLovesMe. Even when you tell us about your problems, i assure you that we won't look at you in another way, but we will give you advice because when we give you advice, we all learn from it not just the person with the problem. May God be with you and please be more open to discuss your issues here on this forum.
May God's peace be with you always.
That's the sad thing about me. I can give advice but when it comes time to follow it, I can't...one of the reasons I stopped posting on this site in the first place. The video is still nice though, I forgot that I had seen that. Thank you for the reminder and please pray for me, I need it.
Joshuaa,
I have really complicated internal issues; I seem to be okay to people on the outside but when they get to know me really well or we discuss any one of my internal issues, they tend to think that I'm extremely weird and kind of avoid me after (mainly because they can't understand what I'm trying to say), I speak from experience...therefore, I have begun to keep my issues to myself. I don't even know how I'm going to explain what I'm going through right now to my FOC. It involves many factors and a lot of different emotions (#1 being extreme self-hatred) due to some situations that happened recently. I'm afraid of being rejected...it's happened way too many times already and it hurts A LOT. Some people just don't understand and can't handle certain things. Thank you so much for your care and support. I appreciate it. And thank you for the verse, it was really nice...I didn't even know it existed in the Bible. Please pray for me a lot.
dzheremi,
I've already tried speaking to people about this in the past. In the past, people didn't have time...others can't understand what I'm saying, some just don't care...how shall I say this? I'm a really interesting personality, it's really hard to be close to me and sometimes it gets to a point where it's also really hard to care about me...this time, it's really complicated, like I said, I don't even know how I'm going to explain it to my FOC. Thank you so much for that quote. That actually helped me a lot as did the other verses people posted. Please pray for me a lot.
Thanks be to God Always,
I sincerely hope I start feeling better soon...there's several occasions in which I seriously considered suicide, this being one of them, and they seem to get worse each time...thank you for the sermon, I will check it out. Please pray for me.
+TheGodChrist+,
Thank you for your kind words. I'm not really sure why God created me actually...I'm pretty useless. That's the only thing that's keeping me from committing suicide...perhaps through some crazy chance, I might have a chance of going to heaven...crazy but perhaps...I doubt my life will get better, it seems to only get worse...in certain aspects of my life, I've already lost complete hope. My loved ones won't suffer if I die...no one will...a lot of people will be much happier actually...it would save them a lot of trouble. You're right though...I should be thankful for what I have. Thank you.
geomike,
I stated above why I can't discuss it with anyone. All I can say is that I hate myself right now...that's what led me to consider suicide. It's too complicated to explain why I hate myself but I do...thanks for your support though. I appreciate it.
Aegyptian,
Thanks.
Your sign-on name underscores, at the minimum, an acknowledgement.
I hate myself a lot!!! Is this good, no, not at all haha. We, you and I both, have to get out of this SIN (thats what it is)!
Why do you feel such hatred, why are you so afraid of rejection. PM me with anything on Earth you want to say; trust me, with matters of internal affairs I feel like I'm pretty up there :P
Regardless, realize, brother, that no matter what you do, God loves you. No matter what sin you commit, God has conceived a plan for you to follow to live a joyous life with Him in it! "We work FROM grace, not for it!!" NOTHING we can do can please God; thats releiving, isnt it? Stop being so harsh on yourself; GOD doesn't punish you as much as you punish yourself.
We are told at an early age to "love our neighbors as ourselves". We take this the wrong way, sadly. We show all the love to our neighbors, and not nearly enough to ourselves. I believe the commandment said AS ourselves, not greater, nor less than.
God is working within you; this will become a time of great prosperity for you if you can pull through. Just realize, that no matter what happens, no matter what failure comes, tomorrow brings a new day, and a new chance. We fail if we stay down, but we suceed if we try; it is just a matter of time.
God Bless You!
Dear GLM,
We all give advice that we don't follow. We are all hypocrites. Take a look at my posts! If I followed half of them, you might chant my name in the glorifications soon, lol. But we all fall short. It's not a surprise to God and it shouldn't be to you.
Know this: You are precious in the eyes of our Lord.
Why is her sex relevant o.O?
Well, I didn't want to call you out but let's look at your post. . . (emphasis mine)
That's why it's relevant.
Whatever we try to do for you is in the grace of rightousness, so who is to judge rightousness. If we speak of doing good because God has brought us to that position in our live, or if we have learned it from the Holy Bible, or our Church Fathers. Know that any good deed that we do for you that keeps you part of our flock is because of the Shepherd.
What is missing in your life Godloves me? Tell us please.
It's easier said than done. Here is what I suggest you do. PRAY. Pray pray pray. Pray as much as you can, whenever you're feeling down. IT IS NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE to NOT FEEL GOD'S LOVE when you Pray! It may come slowly, but it surely comes. Don't be discouraged or frustrated by the contents of your prayer; pour your heart out, your troubles, and literally say "God, here's your workload for the day."
Listen to some sermons, meditate, read a book. Take time and find out what is causing this, how it can be fixed, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, what it can teach you. As RevRun says "The Lord is kind,, He did not bring you this far to leave you". Trust that God is working in you, and although you can't see the fruits just yet, be thankful for this hardship and allow God to better you. You must believe that God will never leave you, no matter what happens here. Pray for me
I'm afraid of being rejected...it's happened way too many times already and it hurts A LOT. Some people just don't understand and can't handle certain things.
Rejected by who? If you know in your heart that God loves you, and that He sacrificed Himself so that you may live forever, WHO or WHAT else really matters? Are you really afraid of being rejected by people whose hearts go wherever the wind blows?
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
+TheGodChrist+,
I'm not really sure why God created me actually...I'm pretty useless.
You think you are useless? If anything, I am pretty sure that at least 1 out of 775 posts has made a difference in another human being's LIFE. It sure has in mine. See, you can impact others, and you've already shown it.
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
That's the only thing that's keeping me from committing suicide...perhaps through some crazy chance, I might have a chance of going to heaven...crazy but perhaps...
If a murderer (St. Moses the Strong), a prostitute (St. Mary of Egypt), a torturer and persecutor of Christians (St. Paul), and an adulteress (St. Photini) can all get into Heaven, I'm pretty positive you have a chance.
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
I doubt my life will get better, it seems to only get worse...in certain aspects of my life, I've already lost complete hope.
I know you're not this hopeless. Do you not know that the God who calmed the seas can also calm the storms inside your heart? Do you not know that the pain that you feel now was first felt by Christ? God...FELT...pain. And this is how He relates to us. He feels directly what we go through. He experienced your pain, and He overcame it. And because He overcame it, all who follow His footprints overcome their pain as well.
Don't lose your hope in your God. He is mighty and has saved you many times before. Be fierce and fight this battle as any soldier would, and victory will inevitably be yours through the love and precious blood of Christ Our Savior.
Pray the 1st, 3rd, and 6th hours of the Agpeya everyday for one week. Pray it with every passion and fiber in your being. Really give it your all. How can God just ignore you? Will He not bestow inner peace upon those who cry out to Him?
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
My loved ones won't suffer if I die...no one will...a lot of people will be much happier actually...it would save them a lot of trouble.
How dare you say that no one will suffer if you die. Every person you know will suffer. Every person on this site will suffer. Your Father of confession will suffer. Your Church will suffer. Your family will suffer (even if you may not believe it). I will suffer and be tormented for the rest of my life, and you don't even know me. Most importantly, you will suffer...and that is the greatest loss of all.
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
You're right though...I should be thankful for what I have. Thank you.
If you try to live a life of thanksgiving, cherishing every moment that God allows you to be on this Earth, you will see God's hand in your life. Your life will be filled with the grace of God, if you try to live a life of humility and thankfulness.
+++
Hi Godlovesme,
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us. That is brave and shows some trust. As for feeling rejected. I'm adopted, I was born in rejection, a stranger in this world. These are people God works so hard on their minds and hearts, as they are different. Their identity is at stake the moment they are born. When I've read the gospel or anything else to do with Jesus Christ, I have strong feelings that he is a stanger in the world as well. But he knew everyone, and knew what they were going to do even though he gave them a chose.
He was rejected before he was born and ended up in the manger, and then again when king Herod wanted him dead and he went to the safety of Eygpt. Which I believe our church has a special relation with God.
I will come back with this. Stay with us please.
God bless you Godlovesme.
And as in all battles and struggles, our strength is in prayer. So I will pray for you, and ask for the prayers of the saints to carry you through this period.
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145036#msg145036 date=1316728201]
dzheremi,
I've already tried speaking to people about this in the past. In the past, people didn't have time...others can't understand what I'm saying, some just don't care...how shall I say this? I'm a really interesting personality, it's really hard to be close to me and sometimes it gets to a point where it's also really hard to care about me...this time, it's really complicated, like I said, I don't even know how I'm going to explain it to my FOC. Thank you so much for that quote. That actually helped me a lot as did the other verses people posted. Please pray for me a lot.
True...thank you.
liftmyheart,
There's too many reasons why I hate myself. I'm afraid of rejection because I've gotten rejected previously many times. Yes, God loves us true. I, however, have no good characteristics. Suppose that I die and stand before God without having done any good but more bad, what do you think God's response will be? Unfortunately I do feel that way sometimes. I know that God loves me but at times I feel abandoned for many reasons. Thank you for your posts. Please pray for me.
Unworthy1,
[quote author=Unworthy1 link=topic=12381.msg145041#msg145041 date=1316736020]
Know this: You are precious in the eyes of our Lord.
Thank you.
Joshuaa,
You ask what is missing in my life? I will tell you: everything good (on my part). I possess no good qualities and I feel as if my purpose in life is severely skewed. At times, I don't know why I do certain things or that I'm doing them for the wrong reason. My spiritual life is messed up; therefore, it's having a negative effect on my regular life. I suppose I can say that what I'm missing in my life is faith. Thank you for your posts. God bless you too. Please pray for me.
+TheGodChrist+,
There's a reason why St. Moses the Strong, St. Mary of Egypt, St. Paul, and St. Photini all got into Heaven. They had strong faith and good characteristics/good works, neither of which I possess. LOL humility...o yeah, I forgot...that's like the #1 reason I hate myself. Thank you for your post though, it was uplifting as were other peoples'.
dzheremi,
Thank you for your post. It was uplifting.
To everyone, thank you so much for your support and care. I appreciate it a lot.
liftmyheart,
I, however, have no good characteristics.
What, in your opinion, are some good characteristics that you wish you had?
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145093#msg145093 date=1316802045]
Suppose that I die and stand before God without having done any good but more bad, what do you think God's response will be?
God is not counting how many times you fall...He's counting how many times you get up. The fact that you are trying to get help, is good. The fact that you care about your soul, is good. The fact that you are trying to change and get up from this period in your life, is good. The fact that you have even the slightest desire to help others on this site, is good. Just from these tiny observations, you can conclude that you have good within you. And this good inside of you was planted by God Himself. He doesn't want you to cut down the tree when a branch breaks. He wants you to keep growing, always striving to learn more and improve yourself.
No one is born "good." We all fell from grace and inherit the nature of Adam. Life is a work in progress. Step by step, God changes you into the person He wants you to be. Don't look at life in the short term; look at it long-term, towards Heaven.
Has there ever been a time in your life when you felt that God was truly there for you?
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145093#msg145093 date=1316802045]
+TheGodChrist+,
There's a reason why St. Moses the Strong, St. Mary of Egypt, St. Paul, and St. Photini all got into Heaven. They had strong faith and good characteristics/good works, neither of which I possess.
No, they didn't naturally possess strong faith. They didn't naturally posses good qualities. Murderer? Prostitute? Persecutor? Adulterer? Good qualities!? Can any "good" come from any of those professions?
It's not about possessing these qualities. It's about working towards achieving them through God's grace. St. Moses the Strong didn't all of a sudden shake off his thirst for women. He worked at it, improving himself day by day, and always learning from his past. That's what you need to do.
[quote author=GODlovesme link=topic=12381.msg145093#msg145093 date=1316802045]
LOL humility...o yeah, I forgot...that's like the #1 reason I hate myself. Thank you for your post though, it was uplifting as were other peoples'.
I don't mean humility in the embarrassing and funny type of way. I'm speaking about humility that has this attitude: "God I am truly and utterly worthless by myself and on my own...but because of your love, "I am the light of the world."
We are God's glory, and He is ours. Believe that God can change you and it will happen.
"...Whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them." (Mark 11:24)
+++
we just need to come to Him as we are and He works with us.
i know lots of people who are difficult to talk to and who have all sorts of problems, they are very much loved by God and i have learned a lot from them.
please talk to your priest and your doctor.
we are praying for you.
My thoughts were like mabsoota's that the best thing to do is to see your priest or a counsellor. Both over the issues with rejection. Not to look for acceptance from others, as it's hard to please anyone. It maybe your reliance on others that makes you feel empty and that you can't be yourself. The reflection isn't there. If you were to relate then you need look no further than Jesus. If Jesus Christ's thoughts and the way he did things were the same as everyone he met then then we would never of heard of him. He gives life.
God bless you Godlovesme.
Suicide doesn't end suffering. It is suffering that starts even more suffering, both for your own soul and for your living family and friends.
You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.
CHOOSE LIFE, life in Christ and no one else! Live for Christ and no one else. He became human, took on our sufferings, so that we may become God.
Take it from a person who's talked gay kids out of suicide:
Suicide doesn't end suffering. It is suffering that starts even more suffering, both for your own soul and for your living family and friends.
You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.
CHOOSE LIFE, life in Christ and no one else! Live for Christ and no one else. He became human, took on our sufferings, so that we may become God.
I agree with you Gay4XC, suicide doesn't end suffering.
But with all due respect, Christ is not gay for you.
You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.
Take it from a person who's talked gay kids out of suicide:
Suicide doesn't end suffering. It is suffering that starts even more suffering, both for your own soul and for your living family and friends.
You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.
CHOOSE LIFE, life in Christ and no one else! Live for Christ and no one else. He became human, took on our sufferings, so that we may become God.
I am confused.. I hope that was a mistake or I am misunderstanding.
[quote author=✞Stavroforos✞ link=topic=12381.msg145208#msg145208 date=1317008040]
[quote author=Gay4XC link=topic=12381.msg145170#msg145170 date=1316961051]
Take it from a person who's talked gay kids out of suicide:
Suicide doesn't end suffering. It is suffering that starts even more suffering, both for your own soul and for your living family and friends.
You need to choose a better solution than one that guarantees more suffering than what you're in now.
CHOOSE LIFE, life in Christ and no one else! Live for Christ and no one else. He became human, took on our sufferings, so that we may become God.
I am confused.. I hope that was a mistake or I am misunderstanding.
You're misunderstanding. Source
Thanks Cephas, I get it now! :)
What are some good characteristics? Hmm genuine kindness? Patience? Humility? Thing is...I don't possess anything...thank you for that...you're right, God is the one who changes us...
Yes, there are absolutely a number of times in which I felt that God was there for me...I just seem to forget those in times of trouble.
What I meant about humility was that I do not possess it at all. I have so much pride in my heart...
At any rate, thank you for your kind words and please continue praying for me.
mabsoota,
Thank you.
Joshuaa,
Thank you.
Thank you everyone for your kind words and encouragement. Please continue praying for me.
-GODlovesme